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I'm sixteen years old, and my mother has multiple personality disorder, severe depression, agoraphobia, and social phobia.
When I was about six or seven years old, my mother found out about her MPD. In a way, it was a relief, as she then knew she wasn't simply insane... To a six year old, this means playmates... One of my mother's alters is an eight year old girl named Katie. When I was younger, I could play and colour with her. There was also a male, I think his name was Tom, who liked to play video games. I know that there were many, many alters when I was little, but they were incomplete personalities, and were integrated. The remaining alters are Bobbie; a female who is between 18 and 22(depending on her mood), she's the agressive defensive one; Katie, the eight year old girl, who is very shy; Cassie, an infant found in the basement a couple of years ago; Andy, a fifteen year old girl who likes Stephen King novels; Reyna, a twenty-two year old southern bell; Kit, literally a baby lion; Marla, the caretaker of the bunch. Marla doesn't come out, since she is basically there to take care of the other alters.
I consider Bobbie a fairly close friend. She's close to my age now, is very sarcastic in a humorous way, and will fight for those she loves to the death if need be.
I don't see much of Katie any more.. since my sister and I have gotten older, she feels that we don't like her any more. I think she's frustrated that she never ages... But I can't be sure.
Andy and Reyna don't come out very often, but I like them all the same. They're both funny, and enjoy things that I like... reading, scary movies, being a girl, makeup.. etc.
I only remember one encounter with Kit. I was probably seven or eight years old, and my sister and I came home from school to find our mother curled up in a ball in the corner, not moving or speaking. I had no idea what was going on.
Cassie only comes out on holidays or when she's afraid. Sometimes my mother lets her sleep, since she sleeps more soundly and consistently than Mom does. She doesn't know very many words, but one can understand her most of the time.
But it hasn't just been fun and games, obviously. Until recently, Mom was very suicidal. She cut herself, I'm not sure if she has recently, and overdosed on her medications on several occasions. The last time I remember her doing that was nearly one year ago. She took a bottle of pills, her keys, and left my sister and I at home. Dad was working, as usual. Monica(my sister, she's eighteen in a few days) and I had no idea where she was going, and no way to help her. We called our dad, he came home, and a while later, we got a call from a hospital. Bobbie had come out after Mom swallowed over 100 pills, and drove to the hospital.
Mom has been in and out of hospitals my whole life, although I don't remember much of when I was little. She told me that she used to go to the same one every year around Christmas time, to the point where when she left, she would say "See you next year," to the nurses. But I don't remember this.
I've also been told some pretty scary things about when I was little. One of my mothers alters, who was integrated(in an explosion, which also destroyed some others, including Andy's twin sister) tried to kill my father with a knife... Mom's brother came over, and apparently she tried to kill him too. I didn't know about that part until last week.
We move around a lot, in fact we're moving within the next month or so, and the house that we actually stayed in until I was eight is where most of the bad things happened. I can't remember much of it, except that it was dark. It seems like it was always dark.
In one of our apartments, I remember my mother crying in her room while I'm trying to calm her down. She kept asking me if she was a bad mother, and I kept telling her that she wasn't.
One of the rental houses that we lived in for eight months is very dark in my memory too. My mother doesn't remember living there, even though she didn't leave the house once in those eight months.
Mom doesn't get out much, due to her agoraphobia, depression, and social phobia(which were passed on to me! Oh, lucky me..)
Last year she went under Electric Shock therapy, because all of the medications that she's tried hadn't been working. Electric shock kills your short term memory for a while. That was interesting, to say the least. :D
Mom has been doing a bit better since then, she isn't quite as depressed, and isn't suicidal.
It's been very interesting and hard trying to take care of my mother while she's trying to take care of us..
Btw, are there any other children of parents who have MPD on here? (or disassociative identity disorder, it's the same thing, just a new name that doesn't quite fit, in my mother's case.)
I'm so, so very happy to have found this website. I'm not allowed to talk about Mom's MPD to any of my friends, she doesn't want them to think she's crazy... so this is all basically... stuck in me. lol

David Baxter PhD

Late Founder
That is an extremely chaotic early environment you've described, Shan.

MPD is, fortunately, quite rare. I think that's why most people find the concept so fascinating (Sybil, Three Faces of Eve, Identity). But of course the reality of actually living with someone with the disorder must be very different from the movies...


I have actually not seen Sybil... We have the book now, and I'll be reading it soon. I like to read about mental health issues... I find it quite fascinating, and I'm able to relate to a lot of them. I want to learn as much as I can to understand those disorders that I do not have.

I actually asked Mother today if I could go back to my last psychologist. I really need an outlet, and since I don't like hurting the people I love, I'm trying to find a way other than cutting to let everything out. I write a lot, but it doesn't help.. >.> So Mom is calling her on Tuesday to set up an appointment. It's been two years since I've seen her. No therapist has ever helped me before, partly because I was uncomfortable, and partly because I don't like to talk to people face to face... I don't want to seem crazy. But hey, that's her job, right? ^__^


Hi Shan,

You have had a challenging life. I hope you do get connected with your psychologist again.

I read the Sybil book and did not find it very helpful in understanding DID. It's a very old novel. You would be better served by follow this advice from a good site on DID:

"We suggest you don't use novels, movies, or biographies as information sources, since they may emphasize sensationalism rather than accuracy."
Looks like there are more suitable books for you to read in the Sidran site resource list for students.

Thanks for sharing!


Thank you for the link. :)

I do have a very good book here at home... my mother. lol She lets me ask all the questions I can think up, so I have a pretty good understanding of DID, I think. Of course I can't completely understand, but I'm trying.
I've also found out some pretty fun stuff about it. DID doesn't seem like a fun thing, especially the way that one developes it... But my mother's alters are fun, intelligent girls.
Like I said earlier, Andy is into scary movies and Stephen King novels... she also likes supernatural stuff, like the television show, Charmed. This is where the fun comes in. I got curious about the environment inside, and how it could be altered... So I asked Andy(she was listening while my mother was out) to try a few things if she wanted. Here's what we found out:
Andy can float for short periods of time.
She can change colours of the things around her.
She can change Kit's appearance for a very short amount of time. -She put spots on her, they faded almost immediately.
She can orb. For those of you who have never seen Charmed...orbing is turning into a bunch of bright lights, and moving your location. Kinda like teleporting, I suppose.
She can move things with her mind.

*Shrug* Gotta have some fun. :p
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