braveheart
Member
I just typed out a whole long post detailing my dilemma. But the computer didn't let it post. Maybe I wasn't meant to post it. But I'll have one more try.
My therapist has in the past said I am not autistic, because I still want relationships, want people.
But.
In yesterday's session it became painfully obvious that I don't know how to connect with people, when the impetus is over to me. I don't know how to make friends, and have none. The last time I really had friends was when I was at university, 15 or so years ago.
My early life is classic autism territory.
And I would never talk to teachers when at school, not until at least middway through the year.
An ex-employer accused me of being autistic because I had [and still do, with those who I don't know] difficulty in making eye contact with her.
I have never had a relationship, never dated. Ever. Part of me would like to, but the rest of me is terrified.
My therapist said she can help me learn how to connect with people, make friends. But I feel so ashamed, so desolate, so alone.
My therapist has in the past said I am not autistic, because I still want relationships, want people.
But.
In yesterday's session it became painfully obvious that I don't know how to connect with people, when the impetus is over to me. I don't know how to make friends, and have none. The last time I really had friends was when I was at university, 15 or so years ago.
My early life is classic autism territory.
And I would never talk to teachers when at school, not until at least middway through the year.
An ex-employer accused me of being autistic because I had [and still do, with those who I don't know] difficulty in making eye contact with her.
I have never had a relationship, never dated. Ever. Part of me would like to, but the rest of me is terrified.
My therapist said she can help me learn how to connect with people, make friends. But I feel so ashamed, so desolate, so alone.