More threads by Heather

Heather

Member
My trip away,

Yeah ok it is meant to be nice to get away and well it was, sometimes?

I went with my mum and sister, in fact I went on an over night train after mediation (a 14 hour trip).

Anyway I got there and hadn?t slept in 2 days so I was tired and it was sooooooooooooooooo hot, so you can imagine I have had 2 days no sleep, I had mediation the day before I arrived (I arrived there at 6:30am anyway) and that was stressful and took a lot out of me, I had just been on a 14 hour train trip, and on top of that it was hot and I had a headache.

Anyway so we went to where we were staying as my sister was there (mum picked me up in her car), well instantly it was make your sister breakfast, so I did, it was do this and that and this and it went on and on, to save the peace I did it all (even mum?s washing you guys have no idea how much I did). The WHOLE 2 weeks!!!

Then there were the arguments, I am ALWAYS wrong, even if it is something I know about, and she treats me like an idiot and tells me basic things and I told her a few times I know etc? well she went off and told me I treat her like a fool etc? then this one stage I was explaining something to her about uni and she said I know (she acts like a 2 year old, no they have more sense! Being that I am a child care worker and all!!!) so she went off and said don?t treat me like a fool I am your mother and I am above you etc? etc? well this was well into the 2nd week and I had been screamed at at least once a day! And this was bad, passing cars could hear and all, she just went off! Well I turned to her, and no I didn?t yell but I said ?excuse me, you are not above me, if anything we are equal. Well she kicked me out of the car in 6 lanes of traffic and I had to walk back to where we were staying (a 3 hour walk)?

This kind of thing went on the whole trip! My nice relaxing holiday!

I felt as I did when I was a child again? She even slapped me once!

Well I sat down with her and said that if we are living together I won?t put up with this etc? and then I got the whole what an awful child and person I was and am and that all her friends kids are so much better (yeah mum and I bet THEY don?t have MY history ? history of abuse), it went on and on and on.

And then while I was there I was finishing off an assignment (got an incomplete as I was ill etc?) well would you believe she threw it and my handbag out the window of the car and sped up so I couldn?t get out and get it. So lucky my wallet wasn?t in there, sigh of relief, but I had to start assignment all over again (I did it, handed it in and passed it now, but still).

Having said all that, she will be here in a few days and we are moving in together again, I don?t know how I am going to live with her again, it is partly like going back to childhood, I have to just not put up with it but how!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

However on the positive side, I went to a concert my sister was in, and to a theme park, did shopping, went to the beach, etc? so SOME of it was fun!

Heather?
 

Eunoia

Member
mmmh.... that sounds like a hell of a trip. and very familiar in terms of extreme 'good' times and extreme 'bad' times all mixed into one. but I agree w/ Janet, I think the best thing for you would be to not have to live w/ her again... you didn't in the past, so why now? it sounds like you have a lot to put up w/ and you really shouldn't have to. you're old enough not to have to be the victim all the time, letting family issues drag you down or people stomping all over you. I know it's easier said than done. but it really doesn't sound like a good living arrangement not to speak of the relationship in the first place.. I though things were going better w/ your mom at first? try to have good relationships w/ your sister and brother without your mother's involvement, if that makes any sense.... it's your sister and your brother and you're all old enough to want to spend time w/ each other if you want to, and if you can do so and make an effort to do things away from all the stress the relationship btwn the 3 of you will hopefully withstand all the other things and be of help when things get too much...
 

Heather

Member
Thanks janetr and Eunoia

I know what you are saying, but the reason I am doing this is it will in fact be better for my sister, sure worse for me though! anything for my sister though!!! I just hope and pray that I am strong enough!!! I am not looking forward to it, especially when I haven?t lived with her for such a long time!!!

:help: LOL

Heather?
 
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