David Baxter PhD
Late Founder
Philadelphia Eagles' Andrews reveals his struggle with depression
By LES BOWEN, Philadelphia Daily News
Tue, Aug. 5, 2008
BETHLEHEM - For more than a year, Shawn Andrews said, he tried to pretend he was OK, even though he wasn't.
Last year, a friend referred him to a therapist in Philadelphia, but Andrews never made an appointment.
"Sometimes I feel kind of embarrassed," said Andrews, who added that he had worried about a fan perhaps recognizing him in a waiting room. "I felt, 'I just can't do it.' "
A private problem started to become a crisis played out in the public eye when Andrews failed to show for Eagles training camp July 24, leading to wild - and largely inaccurate, Andrews said - speculation about the nature of the "personal problems" his agent and the Eagles said were to blame.
Yesterday, the Eagles' two-time Pro Bowl guard said he decided it was time to get his story out.
"I'm willing to admit that I've been going through a very bad time with depression," Andrews told the Daily News in a wide-ranging telephone interview from his home in Arkansas.
Last Thursday, Andrews said, he finally scheduled and kept an appointment with a mental health professional in the Little Rock area.
"I'm on medication," he said, "trying to get better."
"I've had more sleepless nights - I guess it's come back to haunt me for ever bragging about not being stressed-out," Andrews, 25, said. "I kind of put my pride aside, before something really bad happens."
He said he can't say the anxiety and angst that he fears would keep him from focusing on his play if he were here have disappeared, but he is optimistic.
"I have a meeting with my doc on Thursday, and hopefully, I'll be up that way on Friday," said Andrews, who declined to talk about what he thinks led to his problems.
The Eagles will be in Pittsburgh Friday, opening their preseason against the Steelers, but presumably, they will be glad to see Andrews when they get back to Lehigh, if he's here.
A lot has been speculated about team reaction to Andrews' absence; the Eagles are fining him more than $15,000 a day, Andrews confirmed, and they've called his leave "unexcused." Even though Eagles coach Andy Reid said yesterday - before the Daily News spoke to Andrews - that he had spoken to his absent guard within the past few days, the Eagles might not have known Andrews was suffering from depression. In fact, they couldn't have known that, back when they said he was not excused, and started the fines, because Andrews hadn't sought help at that time. The Eagles are believed to have urged Andrews to come to Philadelphia, so they could assess his situation and get him help.
The Eagles declined to say whether Andrews' statements yesterday would change the fine equation. Presumably, Andrews and agent Rich Moran could have recourse through the NFL Players' Association, but Andrews and Moran said yesterday they were concentrating on getting Andrews back to the team, not on the fines. Andrews praised the Eagles for being understanding.
Attempts to contact NFLPA officials for comment were unsuccessful.
"The consequences are what they are. I'm willing to accept them," Andrews said. "Football is important, it's a means to an end, but my mental health, I feel like, is a lot more important . . . It is a ton of money, but, at this time, I don't feel like I can put a price tag on my mental state."
Andrews seemed most concerned yesterday about his teammates' reaction. They've been sweating in the sun while Andrews sits at home. Free safety Brian Dawkins said he certainly understands, and he thinks others will, as well.
"As a guy who went through that early in my career, taking the medication, I certainly understand," said Dawkins, who said he was treated for depression as an Eagles rookie in 1996. Dawkins said he eventually eased off the medication and thinks he resolved his problem through "prayer and having people around me that I knew cared about me."
"It's definitely not a cakewalk," Dawkins said.
Dawkins said people who might think Andrews still should have been functional and shown up for work, even if he is depressed, need to bear in mind that there are varying degrees of depression, and that they aren't qualified to say what Andrews should be able to do.
"I think guys will welcome him back in," Dawkins said.
Andrews has read and heard critical comments from other teammates. Right tackle Jon Runyan, who lines up next to Andrews, opined last week that Andrews needs to get to camp, for his sake and the team's sake.
Andrews said he wants to talk to his teammates when he returns, to "stop some of the bleeding, start some of the healing process maybe a little bit," in terms of their perceptions of him.
"I just want to look 'em in the eye and let 'em all know - this wasn't BS, this was for the mental health of me. I could have gone out there and gotten any one of you hurt" by not being focused, he said.
Andrews, known for being happy and upbeat in public, says in his Eagles media guide biography that he is a fan of cartoon star SpongeBob Squarepants because "I like how SpongeBob handles life. He gets picked on all the time, but he's still happy. He doesn't get angry with people; he just goes through life with a smile on his face."
Lately, Andrews has been reading fans' Internet comments, some of the "rumors about why I wasn't there" and acknowledged he's been taken aback.
"I don't expect sympathy," he said. "I know there are harsh people in this world, but dang, that made me feel low. I do care what people think about me, to an extent."
He said his absence, like the depression, "has kind of turned into this monster, right now. I know everybody's not forgiving; I feel like my teammates will be. But everybody's entitled to their own opinion."
Yesterday, when Reid was asked about Andrews, and the play of sub Max Jean-Gilles, Reid praised Jean-Gilles, but stopped short of saying Jean-Gilles was close to unseating Andrews as the starter.
Andrews, who said he has maintained his recent playing weight of 335, said he is "a fan of Max," and that "Max deserves what he works for."
If the coaches decide Andrews shouldn't start, he will accept that, he said.
But he said they should also know this: "I still have a lot of great football left in me."
By LES BOWEN, Philadelphia Daily News
Tue, Aug. 5, 2008
BETHLEHEM - For more than a year, Shawn Andrews said, he tried to pretend he was OK, even though he wasn't.
Last year, a friend referred him to a therapist in Philadelphia, but Andrews never made an appointment.
"Sometimes I feel kind of embarrassed," said Andrews, who added that he had worried about a fan perhaps recognizing him in a waiting room. "I felt, 'I just can't do it.' "
A private problem started to become a crisis played out in the public eye when Andrews failed to show for Eagles training camp July 24, leading to wild - and largely inaccurate, Andrews said - speculation about the nature of the "personal problems" his agent and the Eagles said were to blame.
Yesterday, the Eagles' two-time Pro Bowl guard said he decided it was time to get his story out.
"I'm willing to admit that I've been going through a very bad time with depression," Andrews told the Daily News in a wide-ranging telephone interview from his home in Arkansas.
Last Thursday, Andrews said, he finally scheduled and kept an appointment with a mental health professional in the Little Rock area.
"I'm on medication," he said, "trying to get better."
"I've had more sleepless nights - I guess it's come back to haunt me for ever bragging about not being stressed-out," Andrews, 25, said. "I kind of put my pride aside, before something really bad happens."
He said he can't say the anxiety and angst that he fears would keep him from focusing on his play if he were here have disappeared, but he is optimistic.
"I have a meeting with my doc on Thursday, and hopefully, I'll be up that way on Friday," said Andrews, who declined to talk about what he thinks led to his problems.
The Eagles will be in Pittsburgh Friday, opening their preseason against the Steelers, but presumably, they will be glad to see Andrews when they get back to Lehigh, if he's here.
A lot has been speculated about team reaction to Andrews' absence; the Eagles are fining him more than $15,000 a day, Andrews confirmed, and they've called his leave "unexcused." Even though Eagles coach Andy Reid said yesterday - before the Daily News spoke to Andrews - that he had spoken to his absent guard within the past few days, the Eagles might not have known Andrews was suffering from depression. In fact, they couldn't have known that, back when they said he was not excused, and started the fines, because Andrews hadn't sought help at that time. The Eagles are believed to have urged Andrews to come to Philadelphia, so they could assess his situation and get him help.
The Eagles declined to say whether Andrews' statements yesterday would change the fine equation. Presumably, Andrews and agent Rich Moran could have recourse through the NFL Players' Association, but Andrews and Moran said yesterday they were concentrating on getting Andrews back to the team, not on the fines. Andrews praised the Eagles for being understanding.
Attempts to contact NFLPA officials for comment were unsuccessful.
"The consequences are what they are. I'm willing to accept them," Andrews said. "Football is important, it's a means to an end, but my mental health, I feel like, is a lot more important . . . It is a ton of money, but, at this time, I don't feel like I can put a price tag on my mental state."
Andrews seemed most concerned yesterday about his teammates' reaction. They've been sweating in the sun while Andrews sits at home. Free safety Brian Dawkins said he certainly understands, and he thinks others will, as well.
"As a guy who went through that early in my career, taking the medication, I certainly understand," said Dawkins, who said he was treated for depression as an Eagles rookie in 1996. Dawkins said he eventually eased off the medication and thinks he resolved his problem through "prayer and having people around me that I knew cared about me."
"It's definitely not a cakewalk," Dawkins said.
Dawkins said people who might think Andrews still should have been functional and shown up for work, even if he is depressed, need to bear in mind that there are varying degrees of depression, and that they aren't qualified to say what Andrews should be able to do.
"I think guys will welcome him back in," Dawkins said.
Andrews has read and heard critical comments from other teammates. Right tackle Jon Runyan, who lines up next to Andrews, opined last week that Andrews needs to get to camp, for his sake and the team's sake.
Andrews said he wants to talk to his teammates when he returns, to "stop some of the bleeding, start some of the healing process maybe a little bit," in terms of their perceptions of him.
"I just want to look 'em in the eye and let 'em all know - this wasn't BS, this was for the mental health of me. I could have gone out there and gotten any one of you hurt" by not being focused, he said.
Andrews, known for being happy and upbeat in public, says in his Eagles media guide biography that he is a fan of cartoon star SpongeBob Squarepants because "I like how SpongeBob handles life. He gets picked on all the time, but he's still happy. He doesn't get angry with people; he just goes through life with a smile on his face."
Lately, Andrews has been reading fans' Internet comments, some of the "rumors about why I wasn't there" and acknowledged he's been taken aback.
"I don't expect sympathy," he said. "I know there are harsh people in this world, but dang, that made me feel low. I do care what people think about me, to an extent."
He said his absence, like the depression, "has kind of turned into this monster, right now. I know everybody's not forgiving; I feel like my teammates will be. But everybody's entitled to their own opinion."
Yesterday, when Reid was asked about Andrews, and the play of sub Max Jean-Gilles, Reid praised Jean-Gilles, but stopped short of saying Jean-Gilles was close to unseating Andrews as the starter.
Andrews, who said he has maintained his recent playing weight of 335, said he is "a fan of Max," and that "Max deserves what he works for."
If the coaches decide Andrews shouldn't start, he will accept that, he said.
But he said they should also know this: "I still have a lot of great football left in me."
