A very good friend emailed me these since she knows I have a good sense of humor about my illness.
I hope no one takes offense to any of these
It is all in fun.
Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
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Patient: Doctor, my wife thinks I'm crazy because I like sausages.
Psychiatrist: Nonsense! I like sausages too.
Patient: Good, you should come and see my collection. I've got hundreds.
------------------------------------------
Two psychiatrists meet on the street. One says to the other,
"You know, I thought I'd been completely analyzed, but yesterday
I experienced the most remarkable Freudian Slip."
The friend nods and waits to hear more...
The first psychiatrist continues, "I was having dinner with my
mother, and I meant to say, 'Please pass the butter', but instead
I said, 'You miserable :badwords: , you've ruined my life!!!".
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How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but the light bulb must want to change!
--------------------------------------------------
A man walks into the psychiatrists office with a pancake on his head, fried
eggs on each shoulder, and a strip of bacon over each ear. The shrink, humoring him, asks,
"What seems to be the problem?" The guy answers, "Doc, I'm worried about my brother."
--------------------------------------------------------
I hope no one takes offense to any of these
It is all in fun.Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
--------------------------------------
Patient: Doctor, my wife thinks I'm crazy because I like sausages.
Psychiatrist: Nonsense! I like sausages too.
Patient: Good, you should come and see my collection. I've got hundreds.
------------------------------------------
Two psychiatrists meet on the street. One says to the other,
"You know, I thought I'd been completely analyzed, but yesterday
I experienced the most remarkable Freudian Slip."
The friend nods and waits to hear more...
The first psychiatrist continues, "I was having dinner with my
mother, and I meant to say, 'Please pass the butter', but instead
I said, 'You miserable :badwords: , you've ruined my life!!!".
------------------------------------------------------
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one but the light bulb must want to change!
--------------------------------------------------
A man walks into the psychiatrists office with a pancake on his head, fried
eggs on each shoulder, and a strip of bacon over each ear. The shrink, humoring him, asks,
"What seems to be the problem?" The guy answers, "Doc, I'm worried about my brother."
--------------------------------------------------------
