I told myself that I was never going hurt myself again. And once again I did it. I guess that means no shorts for me? Why can't I stop from doing this. why is this an addiction, why is it the best way from me to get release, why do I feel like this is the only way of keeping my self in control. I know I do it because people hurt me and I figure they can't hurt me as bad as I can. This really makes me think that I'm not ready to have kids. "One day" ha ha :? If I can't stop this then there's no way I'm going to have kids. I don't want to be a mood swinging pregnant women who is being self destructive. Could you imagine. I imagine all the time and it scares the heck out of me.