Starting Rehab

[kelsischanging]

I'm starting an after work rehab program on Wednesday but I'm worried that is not enough. I CAN NOT go inpatient right now, even though my psychiatrist suggested it. I have a serious alcohol addiction and I'm afriad the after work rehab will not be enough. I'm glad I've at least made that step but oh man....It's Sunday night and I just can not imagine giving up alcohol in two nights. I just need it so much, and I currently live with my parents that ALWAYS have it in the refridgerator...so yes, I can get it out of my room but it will always be there....frustration....

 

[Andy]

That is great Kelsey! It may or may not be enough but wait to see. One day at a time. I was wondering if it would be possible for you to sit down with all the adults in your house and let them know that you are trying to abstain from alcohol and ask if they would be able to help you by keeping the alcohol out of the fridge or putting it somewhere that you cannot get to it or something. That would definitely help in your recovery, rather then having to see it anytime you open the fridge. If they aren't willing to abstain or keep alcohol out of the house for the mean time is there somewhere you can stay while getting treatment?

 

[kelsischanging]

That's a really good idea to just take it one day at a time and see if this program is enough...I've been spending way too much time obsessing over whether or not this program would " fix" me...I've already told my mom that I am doing this program but she and my sister (two of the three adults in the house) just think I need to reduce my alcohol intake...what I really need to do is move out...I'm working on that but I'm not there yet...praying for a way to be able to do that...right now I just need to make it to Wednesday w/out drinking myself to alcohol poisoning...it's like I see wed. as a deadline and I'm trying to "live it up"...it's been a little scary the last few days...

 

[W00BY]

Your anxiety is understandable ... you re making huge steps towards fixing something you have identified and know to be causing you issues in your life.

You are also identifying issues before they actually arise for you which is great i.e the booze in the fridge...and as Andy has suggested speaking to your family about your fears is the way to go.

When we are vulnerable and unsure or making moves to change our lives like this it is only natural that people may not at first realize the help and support you are needing as it can be quite hard to get across what your needing or for them to understand how important it is to you.

Funnily though this is part of rehab you need to be able to say look guys this is really important and something I REALLY need this which when we have other issues concerning us is never a easy thing to do.

I think you have more strength and resolve than you realize... to me you have kept down a job... worked out what is doing you harm... understood you need help...sought it ... and even before rehab started to see where you could run into trouble.

All of the above is no easy task... I have no doubt everyone here is rooting for you I know I am already impressed with how you are handling all this... take your time and give yourself plenty of space and very well done and good luck with your rehab.

As an afterthought you may find that there are associations like here in the UK there is one called al-anon which not only helps alcoholics but the families of them which is particularly helpful to some in recovery as they can take along their family and help them get a better handle on what you are going through and it sometimes helps families to look at their own drinking habits in a new light as well.

This may be something you could consider further down the line.

 

[forgetmenot]

Way to go hun taking that first step in acknowledging you need help then getting it for yourself hugs

 

[kelsischanging]

Thank you all for the support! I'm trying to go forward with an open mind and believing that I have the power to do this...

 

[Banned]

You DO have the power to do this. Don't lose sight of all the hard work you've put into yourself lately. You can do this too. Do not let anyone or anything, including your family, stand in the way of your success.

go Kelsey!

 

[kelsischanging]

Thanks Turtle...I usually spend time only looking at where I need to go and not where I have come from...I've lost 200 pounds in the past 13 months...I need to spend time realizing that is something to be proud of!

 

[ramblin]

Hi kelseym
I have no real advice but just want to send positive thoughts to you. keep strong :2thumbs:

 

[Andy]

Good luck Today!

 

[kelsischanging]

So things didn't go exactly as planned. I went to the intake appointment and at the end of the appointment, the therapist said they wouldn't admit me unless I detoxed inpatient for at least one week. That is just absolutely not possible right now. I can not just disappear from my career for one week. In the last week, I have interviewed for 3 new jobs that would finally be using my college degree. I should hear this week if I'm offered a position but I was told this week by my HR rep that he would be very surprised if I was not offered at least 1 of the positions.

So at first I was totally dejected...felt totally hopeless but I have found another potential place and called them today for an appointment. They didn't get back to me today but hopefully Monday. I still have hope I will get this under control.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

You can't always avoid obstacles but you can avoid giving up when you encounter one.

Good job, Kelsey!

 

[kelsischanging]

Thank you...at first I felt defeated...like there was no other answer....but there was...I got confirmation from my doctor that it was safe for me to detox on my own and I found another program. I refuse to let this control my life and I ABSOLUTELY let this to ruin the fact that I have finally lost 200.6 pounds through gastric bypass and am getting healthy in so many ways....

 

[MHealthJo]

Hang in there Kelsey, gosh what an ironically 'good obstacle' to get thrown in!

Fantastic job not giving up and finding another rehab place and calling them.

xx

 

[kelsischanging]

This isn't the only reason but there all of sudden was all these consequences from family and friends...my career is at a place where it is about to take off (I should be getting two job offers this week that would finally be using my college degree) and I just can not ruin that...I took a serious look at my life and listened to what my friend's were saying and thought to myself..."when did my life become like the show "Intervention" (a TV show in the USA where they follow addicts that do not know they will soon face an intervention by their family and friends)....

My only concern is that I am saying ALL of this while I am still letting myself drink. I am trying to cut down but I am still letting myself drink until I start at this new place and as of now I don't know when that will be....so it's all good in theory but it has not yet been put in practice. I have taken the good steps of calling the place (they should get back to me Monday with the appointment time...but I haven't stopped alcohol....can I still be this strong when it is not in my life??? I fear not....