- Thread starter melia
- Start date
welcome melia! as I have gathered from your other post, you said you've been si since a couple of years, right? the way I see si, it's like an addiction almost, it serves a purpose, it's a coping mechanism, it even releases neurotransmitters in your brain to cause euphoric feelings... but it's a self-destructive behaviour. And unfortunately, it's very difficult to stop any such behaviours on your own, not impossible, just very difficult. Your mom will not be disappointed in you, she might be upset, even confused, maybe even angry b/c she doesn't understand, but if she loves you I would think she would rather know about how you're suffering and try to find you help, instead of thinking everything is fine even though it's not...right? There are other ways to cope with what you're trying to deal with, whatever that may be, some work as distractions in the short term, but ultimately you want to find coping mechanisms that you can utilize in the long term to replace the si behaviour.
Do you ever use any distractions? There's a link on here about ideas for people who self-injure:
http://www.psychlinks.ca/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=536
Also, if you were to talk to your mom, and you don't know where to start or fear that she won't understand where you're coming from, there's also a post about common myths about si that you may be able to take some info from and show her or show her all of it?:
http://www.psychlinks.ca/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=535
Do you ever use any distractions? There's a link on here about ideas for people who self-injure:
http://www.psychlinks.ca/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=536
Also, if you were to talk to your mom, and you don't know where to start or fear that she won't understand where you're coming from, there's also a post about common myths about si that you may be able to take some info from and show her or show her all of it?:
http://www.psychlinks.ca/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=535
the fact that you're asking about the best time to talk to your mom, shows how much you care about her, and not wanting to ruin her day etc.. and it is a valid concern, b/c when someone is having a bad day they're less likely to want to take on more stress and when they're having a good day they're probably happy about that very fact. but I think the underlying point is that you're not burdening your mom either way. generally, a parent would rather hear about their kid's concern even on a 'good' or 'bad' day, than not at all.
I personally don't think that there is ever a 'perfect' time to tell someone something like this, I mean when would you be ecstatic to hear about someone else's problems, right? but I do think that it's wise to think of when and how.. try catching your mom when she has time to actually sit down and listen, so that you can talk for as long as you want. also, try to do it at a place where you have enough privacy so that you're not interrupted every 2 seconds, but that doesn't nec. mean your house, maybe you'd feel more comfortable somewhere public where you still have some kind of privacy but aren't all alone w/ your mom. that's a comfort thing though, and different people will have different preferences. ok, so think of some place and time w/ a reasonable amount of privacy and no time rush.
If you sit down with your mom and try to have a face to face conversation, she will respect you for the fact that you're being mature about this & value her advice. I really do hope that she will react in a good way, but I think bringing along some info (like that one article I gave you the link to) might help her understand more, or give her some info to read up on afterwards.... you won't know though until you try. let us know how it goes?
here's another link that may help you:
Self-injury: Information for Parents
I personally don't think that there is ever a 'perfect' time to tell someone something like this, I mean when would you be ecstatic to hear about someone else's problems, right? but I do think that it's wise to think of when and how.. try catching your mom when she has time to actually sit down and listen, so that you can talk for as long as you want. also, try to do it at a place where you have enough privacy so that you're not interrupted every 2 seconds, but that doesn't nec. mean your house, maybe you'd feel more comfortable somewhere public where you still have some kind of privacy but aren't all alone w/ your mom. that's a comfort thing though, and different people will have different preferences. ok, so think of some place and time w/ a reasonable amount of privacy and no time rush.
If you sit down with your mom and try to have a face to face conversation, she will respect you for the fact that you're being mature about this & value her advice. I really do hope that she will react in a good way, but I think bringing along some info (like that one article I gave you the link to) might help her understand more, or give her some info to read up on afterwards.... you won't know though until you try. let us know how it goes?
here's another link that may help you:
Self-injury: Information for Parents
Ashley-Kate
MVP
...
Hey , what is helping me out a lot on that aspest SI is well my psychologist told me to clean my room out of all the stuff i used to hurt myself and just keep them out of your room will make you have to think before hurting yourself there fore you will not emediatly hurt yourself there will be the thought of what to use and were is it that will run threw your head and you may be able to calm yourself downa dn at the same time realise what you are doingand stop yourself .
it will probably not work emediatly but with patients they may ..
yours trully ashley-kate
Hey , what is helping me out a lot on that aspest SI is well my psychologist told me to clean my room out of all the stuff i used to hurt myself and just keep them out of your room will make you have to think before hurting yourself there fore you will not emediatly hurt yourself there will be the thought of what to use and were is it that will run threw your head and you may be able to calm yourself downa dn at the same time realise what you are doingand stop yourself .
it will probably not work emediatly but with patients they may ..
yours trully ashley-kate
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