The Highly Sensitive Person, Attachment Disorder, and OCD

[nonamer]

hi guys and ladies, I am new to forum. Please forgive my English.

How do you think that high sensitivity can influence relationships? I mean that I found after so many years that I am a HSP and I saw that so many things that I do in my everyday life have to do with that. Being overjealous, being hurt by silly things... Like when my girlfriend decides to do sth on her own or with her friends.. I feel forgotten, abandoned... What's your opinion?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

hi guys and ladies, I am new to forum. Please forgive my English.

How do you think that high sensitivity can influence relationships? I mean that I found after so many years that I am a HSP and I saw that so many things that I do in my everyday life have to do with that. Being overjealous, being hurt by silly things... Like when my girlfriend decides to do sth on her own or with her friends.. I feel forgotten, abandoned... What's your opinion?

This may be less an HSP issue and more one of insecure attachment.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

Can you please tell me some more about this? I see this is quite interesting..

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

You can follow the link in my previous post.

Also see Adult Attachment Disorder and the attached PDF file below.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

Well I have read quite a lot. I feel somehow depressed about what I read. They say that "there is still hope that some things could change". Is it so hard to overcome this disorder? Lately it has been like an obsession to me. Being sad, depressed and feeling abandoned by so silly things. Why can't I trust noone? Why is it so hard to accept such meaningless things? Has it have to do also with low self-esteem and underestimation of self?

Thanks a lot about your replies

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

It is difficult to overcome an attachment disorder probably largely because the individual feels so much distrust and ambivalence about close relationships but that doesn't mean there isn't hope for learning how to have successful relationships. Part of the process is becoming aware of what you do and how you are in close relationships and then working on how to inhibit your "automatic reactions" and restructure your interpretations and perceptions of your partner's actions and reactions.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

In simple words.. what can someone do If he/she suffers from adult attachment disorder? You mean that you can "re-program" your thoughts, so the next time you'll say "this situation is safe"? From my own point of view, this attempt has been made several times but failed. How can you change your temperament or personality of a lifetime in just some time of alternate thinking? How much possibilities does this have to success ?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

That's a task for therapy rather than self-help, nonamer. And I'm not suggesting that it's instantaneous or simple... just that with time and effort you can learn to feel and react differently in relationships.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

well I can see what's you're talking about. Also I would like to mention that I have a strange obsession with order and harmony. I don't know why, but I feel secure when everything's in order. Extremely ordering things. You know the point that meets perfection. I also have watched myself ordering little things without realizing, when I do a serious discussion with someone. Pens on the table must be in the same order as the books or parallel with the table. Of course it is controlled easily. But I can feel the sense of security and calmness when everything is in order. I think that it might have to do with the disorder you mentioned above.

Thanks a lot

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

Quite possibly - that sounds like OCD tendencies.

Please note that I am NOT diagnosing you with anything here - that's not something we do at Psychlinks because it's neither accurate nor ethical. I'm merely suggesting that vthese are things you might consider addressing in face-to-face therapy.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

What about OCD Tendencies? Can you give some info?
Thanks

 

[Jazzey]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

Hi Nonamer,

I'm attaching the link to the OCD forum - Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder :: OCD - Psychlinks Psychology Self-Help & Mental Health Support Forum

There's quite a bit of information there.

 

[nonamer]

Re: The Highly Sensitive Person

thanks a lot