The mourning before

[gardens]

Hi everyone,

I suffer with depression. With a little side of psychosis.

How do i start to feel normal. If i cry I am over reacting. If I'm angry.. I have issues. Help.

garden of good and evil

 

[NicNak]

Re: the mourning before

Medication and therapy can help with coping with your symptoms. Do you have a therapist and are you on medication? It does get easier with time.

 

[Andy]

Re: the mourning before

Welcome gardens!:beer2:

I agree with Nik Nak. Therapy and/or medication.

Who is telling you that your over reacting and that you have issues?

 

[Jazzey]

Re: the mourning before

Hi everyone,
I suffer with depression. With a little side of psychosis.
How do i start to feel normal.

Yes, I understand too well what if feels like to feel different from others. To get tired of the struggle with depression.

So, to answer your question - finding a good psychologist is a really good start Gardens. Someone who can teach you cbt techniques. And I apologize if I'm making you repeat this - do you already have a psychologist? Also, getting the proper medications for the depression.

If i cry I am over reacting. If I'm angry.. I have issues.

Yes, know this quite well too - and I'm always my worst critic in this regard. And, because of the depression, it always feels circular - as if I'm dealing with the same emotions over and over again. It's exhausting at times. Again, maybe it's time for you to stop trying to rectify the situation on your own Garden. Sometimes, whether we like or not, we have to recognize that we need that objective perspective in there, someone who can guide us off the merry-go-round so to speak.

garden of good and evil

One of my all time favorite movies (I love Cusak).

 

[gardens]

Re: the mourning before

Hi everyone - thanks for your comments, suggestions and support.
I am on Celexa 30mg per day and have been for 7 years now.

I had my first depression in 1992 when I ended up in the hospital for 6 months - had 24 ect treatments and I'm sure they tried every medication out there. But finally I got better. I took about 3 years. I found a new job and have been doing well. And last year I crashed again and am really mad at myself for crashing. I know that is wrong and when we talk about stigma of this illness - I think I am my own worst enemy!

I am to go back to work next week after 4 months off and I am really nervous - I hope I'm ready.

I have 3 siblings and 2 of them have drifted away. I know that being around me when I'm depressed is aweful - but know I don't know how to reach out to them again. I am seeing a counsellor - but that takes me some time to open up and let loose.

I guess I just feel crazy and broken. And Jazzey your right this is a merry-go-round. I will fight on. Thanks so much for listening!!
Gardens

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Re: the mourning before

For some people, after a long period of time on a medication such as Celexa, it seems to "stop working". Has your doctor(s) ever suggested switching to something else?

 

[gardens]

Re: the mourning before

Hi Dr. Baxter,

Yes I have heard that meds can 'stop working'. I see my GP at the end of the month and may bring this up with her.

Happy Thanksgiving all you Canadian's!

 

[crzycadn]

Re: the mourning before

Hi Gardens,

Is it possible that the thought of going back to work after being off for 4 months is affecting you on a subconscious level? Maybe anxiety over going back to work is causing your current symptoms?

I am definitely no expert, but with myself, I feel that there are issues just below the surface that cause my moodiness, anxiety or depression. Maybe if you have a friend, co-worker or doctor to talk to about how you feel about going back to work might help. Also, you should give yourself a pat on the back for going back to work.

Good luck!

 

[gardens]

Hi,
Well I'm back at work for two whole weeks now. Much better then I imagined it would go. I'm my own worst enemy - I know that, well some of the time I know that.

I seem to be holding my own now. Doctor didn't want to switch meds. Thought I should keep with what I'm on and we'll reasses in Jan. I'm okay with that.

I've have some lingering problems with 2 siblings though. It's been an terrible year and I feel that they really got frustrated with me and in turn did and said things that still really get to me. I don't know how to start bridging that gap. Any ideas or experience with broken relationships due to depression?

I'd love to hear - I've been reading alot of posts and find them helpful and also some are very sad - I can feel some of the pain out there...just not sure I have too much to offer in comfort yet though.

thanks for reading
Gardens:trickortreat:
and ps....I love the smilie faces - I'm easily amused :woohoo:

 

[why]

Hi gardens,

Glad to hear that it worked out for at work.

Yes, depression is hard on relationships of all kinds. I hear ya.