The urges are bad right now

[Fiver]

Nakker, remember that this is a trial of returning to work. In no way is this set in stone for you, so it might help to stop thinking of this as a sentence rather than a temporary period to see how things go.

Your options are still open. However, I'd urge you to also keep you mind open as well. If you allow yourself to see what is before you, you may find that things aren't as bad as you are anticipating them to be.

Regardless, you still have choices, like your p-doc has said, if this doesn't work out. Hang in there, okay?

 

[Daniel E.]

Also:

In the face of insensitive comments...it may be difficult to feel good about yourself. Remember that you have a medical condition, that it's not your fault and that effective treatments are available. Try not to feel shamed, embarrassed or humiliated if someone knowingly or unknowingly ridicules your illness. Therapy may help you gain self-esteem and put less stock into what others think of you.

Mental illness and stigma: Coping with the ridicule

 

[unionmary]

Thanks Turtle. I have an anti anxiety pill now disolving under my tongue, right now.

Going to start work again soon. I see some co workers and some already say mean things to me.

We are all full of weakness and errors; let us mutually pardon each other our follies
--Voltaire

You are not responsible for your brother's actions.

 

[NicNak]

We are all full of weakness and errors; let us mutually pardon each other our follies
--Voltaire

You are not responsible for your brother's actions.

Thanks Unionmary.

I do forgive them, but the words puncture and hurt deep. This is the part I can't deal with.

Luckily I am not responsible for my brothers actions, but their actions still cause me pain.

I appreciate the words of wisdom.

 

[forgetmenot]

You are better than me as i would not forgive them i would let them know how hurtful they are being and tell them if they have nothing nice to say then keep their mouths quiet but i would use a little harsher words. I am sorry they hurt you but i hope you can ignore their ignorance as they are the ones with a problem not you take care.

 

[NicNak]

It is hard for me to speak up and it is also hard for me to hold onto resentment in the way that keeps me avoiding people, especially at work.

I try to stay as positive as I can and keep arugments to a minimum. Holding onto resentment is exhausting for me as well as the negativity.

Unfortunetly instead of dealing with it with the people who upset me, I take it out on myself in bad ways.

 

[forgetmenot]

I know you internalize pain I do that sometimes but sometimes l just won't take it and i tell them. Why should we hurt ourselves over them they should be the ones suffering right Sorry i just dont understand why people have to be so cruel I am upset because people just hurt people no reasons i have to go now You are kind i know don't let them hurt you okay.

 

[NicNak]

THanks Violet, I will try.

I guess it goes along with the depressive illness and anxiety. Things just pierce when they hurt. It is weird.

 

[forgetmenot]

No not weird i feel that same piercing pain then get mad for letting them do that to me. I am sorry they are cruel You are sensitive and wouldn't hurt anyone so why dothey have to hurt you Stay strong i know it is hard know you are better than them okay

 

[NicNak]

Thanks Violet.

I try to not stoop to their level of ignorance so that is another reason I don't lash back. I just feel like it is adding fuel to the fire.

Hopefully things at work will be ok, but I just don't feel it right now.

The SI urges are still heavy, but not like they were that night. For the past three days they have been here haunting me, but I just fight through it and take my meds when I can't handle it.

 

[unionmary]

You are better than me as i would not forgive them i would let them know how hurtful they are being and tell them if they have nothing nice to say then keep their mouths quiet but i would use a little harsher words. I am sorry they hurt you but i hope you can ignore their ignorance as they are the ones with a problem not you take care.

Touche Violetta!!!!

 

[Daniel E.]

BTW:

Notice how "have to's" and self-criticism lead to stress and anxiety. Replace all self-threats with a message that makes you feel safe with you. Tell yourself: "Regardless of what happens, I will not make myself feel bad. I will not let any event or person determine my worth."

Consider that many forms of shame and depression may be ancient (mammal brain) survival mechanisms to keep us from fighting in situations where we can't win and to maintain social structure, such as bowing to those in power. Use your new human brain to maintain your worth, consider your higher values, and override any lower brain archaic reactions that no longer fit.

http://forum.psychlinks.ca/resource...4-tips-for-awakening-your-strongest-self.html