What do you see in the mirror

[Lana]

Just curious everyone: When you look in the mirror at your naked body what do you see and how do you feel?

ugh...what I see doesn't look good...and I feel condemned to live in it...then I remember reading something about not treating your body like it's an enemy or a waste basket....So, I stop criticizing myself because that only dampens the spirit and doesn't do a thing to the body..actually it makes things worse because for me, food is comforting. I change my perception and perspective into goal oriented vision. i.e. I will exercise, I will eat properly and healthy, I will make an effort to stay away from foods that do harm...and I throw in "I'm pretty" and "wow, what a lovely new haircut you got" :-D

 

[Eunoia]

way to go Lana! you should become one of those tiny people sitting on my shoulder, always ready to throw in those commens the moment I make one of my negative comments again or start to think certaing things... like my personal little? :angel5: or something- think devil vs. angel, one on each shoulder! lol. I remember reading that it helps to deliberately write down say 10 good things about yourself or your day each day, instead of only ever focusing on all the negative things. and it's more difficult than you'd think if you actually sit down and try to do it b/c it has to be genuine! but it does say a lot about negative thoughts and how easily we throw them out there and how they get you nowwhere except down.

 

[Diana]

That's a good idea Eunoia. I think maybe I'll try to do that. Also, what about writing down a few things you like about yourself - physical or not - and taping it to the mirror? That way you can read those things every morning before you start your day.

 

[Mia713]

I reallllllly hate my body. I can't eat anything without feeling guilty about it because I feel like I am contributing to making myself fatter. When I look in the mirror I do not like what I see. I feel like my chest is too small, my stomach is too flabby, my thighs are too big, my waist is too wide, and my butt is huge. I hate everything about myself and feel like my face is gross. I know I shouldn't be so critical of myself and the things that I see others don't, but I can't help it. I feel like I'll never be able to accept and like the way I look.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Have you ever tried stepping a little further back from the mirror and looking at YOU the whole person instead of your face, your chest, your stomach, your thighs, your butt... i.e., all the pieces of you? You are not those pieces. You are a whole integrated person.

And that's what others see.

 

[Diana]

That's good advice. In fact, you don't even need a mirror to see that. Just reflect on yourself. "See" yourself from the inside out and you'll realize that there is so much more to you. I definitely don't do this often enough. It can even be scary, but it can also give you so much more insight. That's why I believe learning how to meditate is very useful. You don't even have to think of yourself as a very spiritual person to do it. Even just 5 minutes a day could be good.

 

[Mia713]

Next time I am feeling very negative towards myself I'll give that a try.

 

[Thelostchild]

Im so glade we all ware clothes..

I hate the way I look. I used to be skinny minny now i have grown into this women body and its icky.. I just want to crawl out of it.

 

[Eunoia]

I know this isn't going to make things better and probably wont' change the way you feel about yourself- and trust me, I can relate. but maybe try to think of it more in terms of a transformation, maybe even a stepping stone to a different stage in your life. it doesn't necessarily have to be "bad"- it's just different, with it come different capacities, experiences, expectations, and adjustments... I guess it's up to each of us what we do w/ this change. David had a good point a few posts above about trying to see your body as a whole. These changes are a part of who you are as a whole, especially as a woman and the way it physically looks does not determine who you are as a whole. Just a different perspective on things...

 

[Halo]

I have been looking at this thread for a long time and wondering whether I should post something or not. I know that it is not going to be good and was scared but anyway.....here goes.

Right now this topic is exactly what I am working on with my T. I have such a hatred towards myself that I know that realistically I am probably not seeing myself clearly. Some (okay most) days I become obsessed with staring at different parts of my body in the mirror and picking myself apart, legs, arms, stomach, hair...just everything, even down to my feet. What I say to myself is the worst, such as fat, ugly, repulsive, disgusting, horrible, unloveable....well you get the picture. I have felt like this for most of my life. I did lose about 100 lbs about 4 years ago and even now I can't see the weight loss in the mirror...I still see myself 100lbs heavier and feel gross.

I know that I will probably regret posting this after I hit the button but I am going to do it anyway.

Take Care
Nancy

 

[Penseroso]

A very old woman, fat. I weigh {{edit: a specific number}} at 5'7" but still I see fat.

In my mid-20s I gained a phenomenal amount of wt from the 5 ads an unethical Dr. prescribed. I went from about {{edit: a specific number to a higher number}} in less than 2 yrs. It sticks in my memory. But 90% of this complex comes from being pudgy as a child. @#$%, but teachers can be more cruel than other kids.

I loathe the modern image women face. Too many women look at celebrities and models and aspire to look as they do. But, as more than one male friend has told me, "just look at them closely in lingerie! Yuck!"

Also the ubiquitous Barbie doll! If that doll were alive, she would collapse. No woman does or can look like those loathsome Barbie dolls! My 6 yr old niece loves hem, but I've never given her one or any accessories.

There was, years ago, a doll to replace the desired Barbie. It had normal proportions (i.e., 36-27-37 or thereabouts. I tried to give the doll to two 2nd cousins aged 5 & 7, but their mother looked at me with rage when she saw the gifts unwrapped. *creepy*

When I'm thinking clearly --and look at a photo of myself instead of my reflection in the mirror, I like my womanly curves and softness.

I wish more men appreciated a woman's natural body instead of the bony models & celebs.

 

[Ashley-Kate]

many people have distorted body images not to mention the image that the media project to people as normal and thin is beyond healthy so it is in a way understandable that we feel this way! but we ahve to be stronger than what are mind thinks think with your heart look at yourself with you r heart not your eyes
eyes lie . when your heart is always true!

 

[PerfectlyFlawed]

When I look in the mirror, i see....

Ugh, look how fat my stomach is....yuck back fat! my thigs are soo jiggly..and my ass is saggy is fat. I wish my breasts were bigger...maybe I would feel better sexually if I had larger ones.

My face is disgusting.. I wish I had someone else's face..and hair.. and skin colour.


but, when I look at the mirror after NOT eating for a day or two.. I think:
Look at my stomach, it looks alot flatter.... if only I could stop eating forever.. but I never can. I dont even have the willpower to do that right!