What if the conflict is with yourself?

[usmwf]

what if the conflict is with yourself?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

what if the conflict is with yourself?

what if the conflict is with yourself?

Hi, usmwf - it's been a long time... glad to see you back.

I'm not sure what you mean by your question, though... can you expand on that a bit?

 

[usmwf]

hello,

Hi yep it has been a while, I have been so busy between cleaning, my site and family - do people have spare time?..haha

How's it going with you?

Ok the question does seem a bit off - after i wrote it I had to laugh, but here's the thing. I received my brother's autopsy report - it shows that he was in perfect health before he died.

I have also done a little research into burn victims - .my brother was burned over 98% of his body with 3rd and 4th degree burns.

Now that I have had time to do some research I've found that there are many people who survive. I can find no real reason that we were advised to let him go. Hence fighting with myself? I thought about taking the paper work into my doctor and having her explain the medical end of it all. The fact is no matter what the out come it's to late now but knowing myself the way I do, it's going to keep eating at me. So I need a referee?

Thanks for letting me blow some steam!

 

[David Baxter PhD]

what if the conflict is with yourself?

I know that second-guessing doctors in such circumstances is inevitable - why did they do this? why did they not do that? what could I have done?

I don't know if it would help for you to discuss this with the doctor or not - I guess no one can really answer that question except you. Every patient is different - the circumstances are never exactly the same, in spite of the fact that you may read about other people who seemed to have suffered exactly the same wounds, it's unlikely that they were really exactly the same.

I think another thing to ask yourself is do you really want to hear the answers? Most of your questions will have to do with his earthly body, not his spirit or his soul or the essence of who is was and is...

As I said, I don't know the answer for you - I do know that I have in the past struggled with questions like yours - my answers, to some extent anyway, worked for me but you must find your own.

 

[usmwf]

thanks

Funny my husband said about the same thing…thanks for taking the time!

 

[Laurie]

conflict within yourself...

I hope my thoughts are appropriate to share here. Please let me know if they are not.

I have found when I am struggling with similar inner conflicts that I need to go back to the information I had at the time of my decision (not all the additional info I have now) and realize that I made the best decision possible at that time. I guess it's a way to forgive myself for things not happening the way I wanted them to. It's easy to find more information after an event and look back and say "what if I had done.....instead". But why do we do this to ourselves? We didn't have that information when we were having to make the decision and we need to trust ourselves (or God if you are religious) to know that we did the best we could with what we had to work with. I'm not preaching - I struggle with this all the time. I just find comfort with this thought sometimes so I thought I would share it.

 

[usmwf]

Re: conflict within yourself...

Laurie:

I hope my thoughts are appropriate to share here. Please let me know if they are not.

Everyone one has a slightly different take on what works. These things have crossed my mind. It's really the only way to come to some finality with something like this. Thank you for the reinforcement. Good luck in your struggles.