What if......

[Cat Dancer]

I can't wrap presents. What if everyone hates their gifts? What if, what if, what if. Most of it is silly stuff. This is OCD isn't it? Worrying about things this way. I am going to make a small list with less than ten things on it and work on that list today. And if all of it gets done, great, and if I don't finish the list that is ok too. UGH. It is a battle. And I am weak.

 

[Retired]

What if everyone hates their gifts?

It's a gift!! If someone who receives a gift in the generous and thoughtful spirit in which it is given, and doesn't like it, it's their problem, not yours.

 

[GDPR]

It's a gift!! If someone who receives a gift in the generous and thoughtful spirit in which it is given, and doesn't like it, it's their problem, not yours.

How would you suggest a person handles an awkward situation where someone doesn't like their gift?I don't mean children,because really young ones don't know any better,I mean adults.What do you do if someone tells you they don't like their gift,or worse,they laugh at it and make you feel really stupid for giving them what you did?I have actually had that happen before and I was SO hurt and humiliated.

 

[Cat Dancer]

I don't give any gifts to adults. If someone doesn't like my gift they would never get one from me again. I don't think I would say anything at the time though. Because I'm not brave enough.

 

[GDPR]

It was my mother that laughed.I spent a lot of time(and money) on her gifts and she laughed and made fun of each one after she opened them.I didn't say anything at the time,I was so hurt and shocked and I thought maybe I misunderstood or something,but when I talked about it afterwards with my husband,he was upset too,he didn't know what to say when it was happening either.

I haven't bought her a gift since then,as a matter of fact I don't have any contact at all with her anymore.But since then,I do worry when I buy a gift for someone,and I would like to be prepared ahead of time with some sort of comment...or something,in case it would ever happen again.

---------- Post Merged at 05:18 PM ---------- Previous Post was at 04:45 PM ----------

This happened with my mother about 4 years ago,by the way.

 

[Cat Dancer]

Honestly, the way I've been feeling lately I would probably take the gift and leave. I don't think I would even say anything. not mature maybe, but laughing at someone's gift like that is mean.

 

[Ftbwgil]

Hi There is a book called The Four Agreements. It's its a really good book as it helps us understand people behavior ... a bit..... When people mock and ridicule others it is because they are unhappy with themselves. for someone to laugh while they are opening a gift is really different... dysfunctional..... when you think about it if someone is in a good place then they will be appreciative welcoming inviting.. but .. if they are in a bad place then they will express the emotion they feel through action. The reaction your mother had was more so a reflection of how she felt about herself.. It was her who was belittling herself and while that is not what we see at first think about it. I am at ease with myself and do not have to condescend others to feel better so any good gesture towards me is greeted with admiration and appreciation as it is a act of friendship. Unfortunately when your mother reacted this way her feelings about herself etc inside obscured the act of kindness you displayed. I cannot see her being in a good place having acted that way. Does not mean you have to take the abuse either.

Have a nice Xmas

 

[MHealthJo]

There is nothing you need to be prepared to do or say to save face if that happened LIT. The person left looking weird and embarrassing would be the person who acted that way.