• Quote of the Day
    "You are much deeper, much broader, much brighter than any idea you could have of yourself."
    Harry Palmer, posted by Daniel

Ash

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janetr said:
Yes, that's it exactly. And you have felt that way too? It really stinks.

That's an understatement! I still irritate my bf because he has a hearing problem so I have to repeat myself. Well, if I have to repeat myself part of me is thinking that he's just not listening and then I flip out a little. It's silly but it's all a part of validation. Growing up I was told that I didn't feel something or that I shouldn't feel something or that I didn't even know what I was feeling.

[And it's so frustrating because I have such a strong desire to stop, but every few weeks I just lose it and cut myself or burn myself and then it seems it's all for nothing. Plus I'm already so scarred up I never wear short sleeves so no one sees and I figure what difference does it make anyway. But I'm not giving up. Every day that I DON'T do it is a small triumph, I suppose?

You are CORRECT! Sometimes you have to take it day by day. There's nothing wrong with that. You will get to the point where you're taking it week by week, month by month. You want to stop. That's the biggest obstacle to overcome. Well, along with triggers. :-/
 
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Ash said:
That's an understatement! I still irritate my bf because he has a hearing problem so I have to repeat myself. Well, if I have to repeat myself part of me is thinking that he's just not listening and then I flip out a little. It's silly but it's all a part of validation. Growing up I was told that I didn't feel something or that I shouldn't feel something or that I didn't even know what I was feeling.

With my husband I can repeat myself numerous times (he's really not listening) and that's ok, but if he has to repeat himself ONE time with me then he gets SO angry.

It was so confusing growing up that way. I don't know how to get over it. I guess it takes time.


Ash said:
You are CORRECT! Sometimes you have to take it day by day. There's nothing wrong with that. You will get to the point where you're taking it week by week, month by month. You want to stop. That's the biggest obstacle to overcome. Well, along with triggers. :-/

Yeah, triggers are hard, especially when I can't figure out exactly what they all are.

How are you doing today?

:)
 

HA

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Sure thing. Most of us did not learn healthy coping mechanisms while growing up. Most of us went through a lot of trauma that brought up overwhelming emotions. I consider myself to be very strong (after all I'm still around!) but there are times when I become so overwhelmed that I have no idea how to cope. In the past I've cut, hit myself, thrown things (at least that's not self-destructive), drank, done drugs, just to get by. I'm doing my best to figure out the best way of dealing with life.

Ash,
Thanks. That made things more clear. I'm so glad you are strong and figuring out the best way to deal with life.

Janet,
Thanks. I can't imagine not being allowed to express emotions as a child. No crying or anger etc., would make life confusing. Hope you accomplish making things the best they can be in your life.
 

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