What is wrong with me?

[-Robin-]

Hi I'm new here and unsure of what is wrong with me! I think it may be a personality disorder but I'm not sure!

I'm a 28 year-old man and most of my closest friends are people I have met on the net! The only problem is with one person in particular I seem to have serious issues! On the most part I'm very helpful to her and have been there for her while she has gone through some pretty serious stuff. But now I'm down in the dumps she doesn't seem to care!

She says she appreciates everything I have done for her but I just want her to be there for me when I need someone! And when she isn't it makes me a bit angry and I send her text messages where I'm having a go at her for silly petty reasons and it starts rows between us!

I'm afraid if it doesn't end soon I will lose her as a friend and that would break my heart!

Is the fact I'm ok and nice to her one minute then horrible the next the early signs of Schizophrenia (pardon the spelling, I know it's wrong)? Or is it some other form of personality disorder?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Welcome to Psychlinks, Robin.

First, I can assure you it's not schizophrenia. It sounds more like you are showing some signs fo social anxiety and low self-esteem and self-confidence. When you feel rejected or hurt, you lash out. And as you know, that doesn't end up getting you what you want from other people.

On the net or off, there are some friendships or relationships you will have that simply are not reciprocal - that's just life. If you truly feel this person only wants a one-way relationship, where you support her but not vice versa, you need to decide if a friendship on that level is okay with you. But I think you also could look at what you might be doing to contribute to the problem. Are you perhaps too demanding or intense when you seek support from your friend? Do you reject her attempts to give you advice or input? Do you give her an opportunity to get a word in edgewise? Perhaps she's afraid to say anything by now for fear you will lash out at her again.