When you're not the shy one

[Chain Lightning]

Ok, there's this guy I see a lot....I think he's totally ****ing hot. I catch him looking at me but he always looks away when I look at him. I walk towards him, look at him and no sooner than I think to say "hi" he looks away. Yet he walks past me as much as he can (obviously a short quicker route would not be right by me). He does it a lot...and when people he has seen me with run into him, he looks at them but not to other people. He acts like he likes me but he avoids me. How do I approach a guy like this? I don't think I did anything to scare him.

 

[Daniel E.]

and no sooner than I think to say "hi" he looks away.

Actually saying the word "hi" may help

 

[Chain Lightning]

Well, he has headphones on so looking is important...forgot to say that. LOL

 

[forgetmenot]

Ask him what music he is listening to start there perhaps.

 

[Chain Lightning]

OK I haven't seen this shy guy in ages until last week...I didn't see him when I came in and started walking around the track. He stopped doing what he was doing and walked towards me on the track. When I see people I always avoid looking them so I can gain some composure, then say hi or whatever. I think he thought I was avoiding him because when I looked back at him he looked away and moved off the track. He looked away but watched me in his peripheral.

I know this is stupid because I figure he likes me (everybody else says so too). For some reason I can't get myself to just smile at him and look at him when he first looks at me. I want to talk to him but I can't even think. Its like I think I can just do it but when I see him I can't.:hopeless:

 

[adaptive1]

Why don't you smile at him the next time you see him on the track and wave hello since he has headphones on. Maybe you will have to do that a few times and then it will be easier to start up a conversation.

 

[Chain Lightning]

I didn't see him today dangit. I'll just try to smile at him, that's my goal...I hate it when I feel so jittery.

 

[Daniel E.]

To add to what Adaptive1 said:

Social Anxiety: How to Be a Better Monkey

It really is amazing how much a smile, wave, or friendly voice can do.

 

[Chain Lightning]

The good thing is, last time when he walked towards me he had taken the headphones off.....why couldn't I smile at him then? Why does it take me too long to gain composure?

 

[Chain Lightning]

OK guys....I haven't see Shy Guy in a while.

But...there was another guy I saw today leaving the gym. I said hi to him and smiled....his response was a reluctant hey. I took the hint and kept going to the car....moments later I saw him leave with his g/f. Oh well....but hey I DID IT!

 

[gooblax]

Congrats on saying hi! :2thumbs:

 

[Chain Lightning]

Hey I said hi to another guy, he said hi back but that's it...maybe I'll get luckier next time?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

"Hi back" is pretty good. And kudos to you for taking the risk.

 

[Chain Lightning]

OK Remember that guy I was talking about at the gym? I did it, I said hi to him!!! But his response was confusing.

I said hi to him but he had his headphones on. :facepalm:

I was behind the machine he was using. When he was finished, he got down and walked off but left his towel. Then he came back, head phones blasting, when he got next to the machine I looked right into his eyes and said "hi". I started to smile but....

His response: His eyes got serious, kinda big and he froze for an instance...he slowly looked down, then turned and wiped down the machine...like real thoroughly. Then he kind of lingered nearby and so did I, then I left.

Should I keep trying? Or does he want me to leave him alone? I am not sure!!! He's so weird!!!! But hot!