The Top 10 Thoughts that are Keeping You Stuck
by Tonya Leigh, Just B Living E-zine
January 14, 2010
by Tonya Leigh, Just B Living E-zine
January 14, 2010
1. I don?t have enough time.
If you want to feel instant overwhelm, then keep telling yourself that you don?t have enough time, that you are running out of time, or any version of a time emergency.
The truth is that you have all the time that you need to do what you choose to do.
2. I am fat.
In my opinion, this one sentence is as bad as eating a whole bag of Oreos.
Fat thoughts lead to fat feelings, which lead to fat actions.
Telling yourself that you are fat does not serve you. It is your own self-inflicted judgment. If you are overweight and want to indulge your weight, then stick to the facts of what yo u weigh. For example, ?I weigh 220 pounds.? But, please don?t beat yourself up with the word ?fat.? It will only make the pounds harder to shed.
3. It?s too hard.
Whether it?s losing weight or trying to organize your finances, it does not help matters to embellish the difficulty of the task at hand.
Think about it. When you tell yourself that something is hard, doesn?t it seem to get harder?
I had this experience when running my first marathon on Sunday. I woke up with thoughts about how hard it was going to be. I could feel the intensity of the situation increasing just by my thoughts alone.
If I wanted to finish the marathon, I knew that I had to change the mental game plan, and the world hard was not going to be a part of that plan.
I?m not suggesting that things aren?t difficult. They can be and they often are. However, amping up the ?hardness? in your mind, only makes it harder.
4. She?s prettier than me.
Women are notorious for comparing ourselves to another.
Where does it get us? Absolutely nowhere, except in a constant state of depression and anxiety for not measuring up to self-made expectations.
Whenever I catch myself doing the comparing game, I think about what Byron Katie says about the three kinds of business: My business, everybody else?s business, and God?s business.
Whenever you compare yourself to someone else, you have stepped out of your business and into the business of someone else.
Comparing is our minds way of keeping us stuck in a constant state of chasing after an illusion.
The comparing mind never, ever wins.
You are as pretty as you see in your mind, and tha t is your business.
5. I should......
Any sentence that starts with a should needs immediate investigation.
It?s not to say that you should or shouldn?t do something, but using this word is a great way to initiate instant overwhelm.
If you look up the word ?should,? you will find that its definition includes ?obligation.?
Women do NOT need more obligations. We have plenty.
So, instead of saying things to yourself like, ?I should cook more healthy foods for my family,? try substituting the word ?could? instead.
Could indicates possibility, and when you stop putting so much pressure on yourself, the possibilities are endless.
6. I?m not that kind of woman.
Have you ever had a goal so big that your immediate response was to give every reason why you are not the type of woman to do that sort of thing?
Renee, one of my clients, recently told me during a session that she wanted to be one of those girls who could spend 30 minutes on the elliptical followed by 30 minutes of weight lifting.
Then she said, ?But, I?m not that kind of girl.?
Well, let me just tell you that I use to have the same thought about my ability to run a marathon, and I was only able to complete one when I stopped trying to convince myself that I was not that kind of girl.
You can be any type of woman you choose to be.
You decide.
7. I don?t know what I want.
I have been SO guilty of this one, and while it may seem very true, this thought alone blocks you from knowing what you want.
Most often, we know exactly what we want, but we are afraid of making a mistake. Fear convinces us that we have no idea what we are seeking. &nb sp;
Instead of telling yourself that you don?t know what you want, try telling yourself that you are figuring it out.
This unblocks the channels and allows the knowing to flow to you.
8. I?m too old.
I hear this thought from women as young as twenty-six. There seems to be this biological clock that starts ticking when we are around thirteen and goes off in our early twenties, not leaving us with a lot of time to explore and figure it out.
Ironically, I remember having this same thought in my late twenties when I compared myself to other women my age who seemed to ?have made it.? Again, the comparing mind never, ever wins.
However, when you tune back into yourself and focus on what you want to accomplish, age is never a factor, unless you are wanting to become a professional gymnast. So, stop telling yourself that you are too old. Age is only a factor when you make it one.
9. I don?t have enough money.
The media reminds us every day of the failing economy. Our investments are tanking. People are losing jobs. You have every reason to tell yourself that you don?t have enough money, but ask yourself how it feels.
Continuing to repeat negative thoughts, such as ?I don?t have enough money? is not serving you, and it only provides you with a reason to settle in your life.
Is there something you want to accomplish that requires money? If so, start looking at creative ways to make it happen. However, don?t use the money card as a reason not to follow your dreams or reach your goals.
10. I can?t control my thoughts.
My clients will sometimes ask me how to turn off the mind chatter.
?You can?t,? I tell them .
Trying to control controlling your thoughts adds more resistance to resistance.
The solution: don?t try to control your thoughts. Let them come and go. You will always have them.
However, here?s the secret: you get to choose whether to believe and embellish them or just notice and let them go.
BONUS THOUGHT: I screwed up.
Nope, you didn?t screw up. You just stumbled upon an awesome lesson. Learn, grow and keep on trucking!
____________________________________________________________
Someone once said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again. If you feel stuck, chances are you are telling yourself the same thoughts over and over again.
Thoughts are powerful when you believe and act off of them. However, when you recognize them as excuses that are blocking your possibility, you can begin to disregard those thoughts that don?t align with who you really are: a brilliant and beautiful individual.
If you want to feel instant overwhelm, then keep telling yourself that you don?t have enough time, that you are running out of time, or any version of a time emergency.
The truth is that you have all the time that you need to do what you choose to do.
2. I am fat.
In my opinion, this one sentence is as bad as eating a whole bag of Oreos.
Fat thoughts lead to fat feelings, which lead to fat actions.
Telling yourself that you are fat does not serve you. It is your own self-inflicted judgment. If you are overweight and want to indulge your weight, then stick to the facts of what yo u weigh. For example, ?I weigh 220 pounds.? But, please don?t beat yourself up with the word ?fat.? It will only make the pounds harder to shed.
3. It?s too hard.
Whether it?s losing weight or trying to organize your finances, it does not help matters to embellish the difficulty of the task at hand.
Think about it. When you tell yourself that something is hard, doesn?t it seem to get harder?
I had this experience when running my first marathon on Sunday. I woke up with thoughts about how hard it was going to be. I could feel the intensity of the situation increasing just by my thoughts alone.
If I wanted to finish the marathon, I knew that I had to change the mental game plan, and the world hard was not going to be a part of that plan.
I?m not suggesting that things aren?t difficult. They can be and they often are. However, amping up the ?hardness? in your mind, only makes it harder.
4. She?s prettier than me.
Women are notorious for comparing ourselves to another.
Where does it get us? Absolutely nowhere, except in a constant state of depression and anxiety for not measuring up to self-made expectations.
Whenever I catch myself doing the comparing game, I think about what Byron Katie says about the three kinds of business: My business, everybody else?s business, and God?s business.
Whenever you compare yourself to someone else, you have stepped out of your business and into the business of someone else.
Comparing is our minds way of keeping us stuck in a constant state of chasing after an illusion.
The comparing mind never, ever wins.
You are as pretty as you see in your mind, and tha t is your business.
5. I should......
Any sentence that starts with a should needs immediate investigation.
It?s not to say that you should or shouldn?t do something, but using this word is a great way to initiate instant overwhelm.
If you look up the word ?should,? you will find that its definition includes ?obligation.?
Women do NOT need more obligations. We have plenty.
So, instead of saying things to yourself like, ?I should cook more healthy foods for my family,? try substituting the word ?could? instead.
Could indicates possibility, and when you stop putting so much pressure on yourself, the possibilities are endless.
6. I?m not that kind of woman.
Have you ever had a goal so big that your immediate response was to give every reason why you are not the type of woman to do that sort of thing?
Renee, one of my clients, recently told me during a session that she wanted to be one of those girls who could spend 30 minutes on the elliptical followed by 30 minutes of weight lifting.
Then she said, ?But, I?m not that kind of girl.?
Well, let me just tell you that I use to have the same thought about my ability to run a marathon, and I was only able to complete one when I stopped trying to convince myself that I was not that kind of girl.
You can be any type of woman you choose to be.
You decide.
7. I don?t know what I want.
I have been SO guilty of this one, and while it may seem very true, this thought alone blocks you from knowing what you want.
Most often, we know exactly what we want, but we are afraid of making a mistake. Fear convinces us that we have no idea what we are seeking. &nb sp;
Instead of telling yourself that you don?t know what you want, try telling yourself that you are figuring it out.
This unblocks the channels and allows the knowing to flow to you.
8. I?m too old.
I hear this thought from women as young as twenty-six. There seems to be this biological clock that starts ticking when we are around thirteen and goes off in our early twenties, not leaving us with a lot of time to explore and figure it out.
Ironically, I remember having this same thought in my late twenties when I compared myself to other women my age who seemed to ?have made it.? Again, the comparing mind never, ever wins.
However, when you tune back into yourself and focus on what you want to accomplish, age is never a factor, unless you are wanting to become a professional gymnast. So, stop telling yourself that you are too old. Age is only a factor when you make it one.
9. I don?t have enough money.
The media reminds us every day of the failing economy. Our investments are tanking. People are losing jobs. You have every reason to tell yourself that you don?t have enough money, but ask yourself how it feels.
Continuing to repeat negative thoughts, such as ?I don?t have enough money? is not serving you, and it only provides you with a reason to settle in your life.
Is there something you want to accomplish that requires money? If so, start looking at creative ways to make it happen. However, don?t use the money card as a reason not to follow your dreams or reach your goals.
10. I can?t control my thoughts.
My clients will sometimes ask me how to turn off the mind chatter.
?You can?t,? I tell them .
Trying to control controlling your thoughts adds more resistance to resistance.
The solution: don?t try to control your thoughts. Let them come and go. You will always have them.
However, here?s the secret: you get to choose whether to believe and embellish them or just notice and let them go.
BONUS THOUGHT: I screwed up.
Nope, you didn?t screw up. You just stumbled upon an awesome lesson. Learn, grow and keep on trucking!
____________________________________________________________
Someone once said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again. If you feel stuck, chances are you are telling yourself the same thoughts over and over again.
Thoughts are powerful when you believe and act off of them. However, when you recognize them as excuses that are blocking your possibility, you can begin to disregard those thoughts that don?t align with who you really are: a brilliant and beautiful individual.
Tonya Leigh Williams is a coach, speaker, and writer. She is also the founder of Just B Living, a company dedicated to empowering women to create amazing lives and bodies without dieting, deprivation and drama. If you want to learn more about how to lose weight from the inside out, you can sign up for a FRE*E subscription to the Just B E-zine, you can click here: Just B Living
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