steel_lady
Member
I have been in relationship with adult survivor of sexual abuse. The relationship ended some time ago due to the fact that I didn't want to have children for a couple of years more since I was bounded with a contract while he was obsessed to have a baby before he 'gets old'. He felt old and was afraid of old people. Then, after a couple of weeks being involved with a girl from his company, he got her pregnant and has a baby now. He told me that he doesn't have intentions of marrying her ever, he gave his name to the baby and says he has taken care of his future. They gave the baby to kindergarten with 4 months, he is telling that the little one 'has to learn about life' and intends to be very strict with him. I am aware of his unusual stubborness, lack of empathy or need for friends and it makes me afraid for the baby. What is he capable of? I had even worse feeling when once we were talking about educating the child and he told me with a strange laughter that he is 'very openminded'. We could never talk about his abuse and problems because he would deny and dissociate. I could never talk about intimate things with his sister, but to me she is also showing strong signs of problems that abuse leaves. I believe she was also abused but nobody knows. I feel helpless. I would like so much to be able to do some difference in their lives. It was 'somebody like their grandfather' (while I am prone to believe that it WAS their grandfather). As far as I know, their family doesn't know and I am among very few people who know. I got on with my life but it is hard for me to live and to know that I didn't do any difference. And I don't want any new babies to suffer.
