• Quote of the Day
    "You are much deeper, much broader, much brighter than any idea you could have of yourself."
    Harry Palmer, posted by Daniel

HotthenCold

Member
Joined
Sep 12, 2007
Messages
206
Points
16
Hi there,

I'm really worried about my personality. Sounds dumb I know, but I really have to say that a constant aspect of my social life is people noticing right away that I'm different. I talk quietly, say weird things at odd times, my timing in conversation is awkward, i get flustered in social situations and end up laughing too much or saying something just for the sake of saying something, I'm kind of dumb a lot of the time;I really thinks it's partly because I dissociate froms situations so regularly that I don't pay attention to what other say, and what's going on around me and so I seem dumb. Though recently I've come to wrry very greatly that I am a lot dumber than I thought, since it's a constant image others have of me in many different social circles. I know I'm damn smart in some ways, and others don't/won't recognize this because they like to have a punching bag, or so I've come to believe. gah. I always seem to muck up social interaciton to the point where people are either annoyed, weirded out, or just amused at the freak that is me. It's a crap feeling but I can't "be normal". I'm me, and I know that that's not gonna change, but "me" is kind of pathetic and I hate my self sometimes. Not completely, like I don't think I'd kill myself, though I have though about it.
It's a depressing situation because all of societies demands are things I (for the most part) can't fulfill in social situations; i'm worried because people are quick to exclude and label. The social darwinist perspective constantly beats me in the face and makes me feel warped.
Not sure how, or if, I can "make my self over" for good, but I really need to change. If you don't like who you are, and "you" is a fundamental unchangeable being, then what do you do?
 

braveheart

Member
Joined
May 8, 2005
Messages
1,485
Points
36
Re: always awkward

I'll come back to this later when I have more time, but I just wanted to say how much I can relate.
 

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