Broken?

[Rosa]

Recently I had Pneumonia and as such had to have xrays done. When I did my follow up with my doctor she asked 'so when did you break your back?' I don't remember ever breaking my back-you'd think a person would have remembered something like that, but I guess it happened at an age where I just don't remember it. What gets me is my response....it really makes me feel worthless. I know that doesn't sound right but thats what it does. Theres no indication of any back surgery so does that mean they broke my back and did nothing???? I know I was removed from my father when I was 12 because of child abuse but come on... to actually break someones back and do nothing...I just don't get that. I also don't get why this makes me feel so worthless. Any ideas??
Rosa

 

[braveheart]

Well, your back supports you.... like, emotionally and physically, as I see it... so having a once broken back could leave you feeling vulnerable and unsteady. Maybe.

 

[Rosa]

Thanks Braveheart.
Don't know why but this one really bothers me. Maybe its because someone told me about it and I didn't know it before??? Maybe because I'm shocked that someone could break someones back and not do anything??? But whatever the reason I think of it and really feel very little value about myself. Its like I wasn't even worth fixing.
Rosa

 

[Into The Light]

for someone not take care of your broken back doesn't say anything about you, rosa, it says something about the person not taking care of you. it was cruel and coldhearted of this person, who clearly was incapable and unfit to be taking care of a child.

 

[Rosa]

Thanks Ladybug...I guess your right....its just hard sometimes when our feelings don't fall under the 'whats right' catagory.
Rosa

 

[Into The Light]

it is not unusual for people to interpret it the way you have, rosa. you tend to think, "what was wrong with me for someone not to want to take care of my back. i must have not been worth the effort." we tend to put the blame on ourselves for some reason. but you're not to blame, this person is. you were and are worth the effort, rosa. :hug:

 

[Rosa]

thanks ladybug...I apprecaite your feedback.
Rosa