More threads by Roy H.

Roy H.

Member
I have been procrastinating on choosing (more like, commiting) to a college major because I am such a terrible social phobe. I have looked at jobs in the paper and it's always: looking for outgoing, teamworker who has good people skills, etc. and I always just wind up crossing those ads off, even though a good portion of those I believe I am qualified to do.

I have an Associates degree and I now have to choose a major but I have not been able to now for some time. It's close to going on a year, and every time my mother says "go do this" or "go do that," I try to explain my extreme fear of being by others I am not familiar with or who haven't known me for very long. (some of you here are familiar with my situation from reading my previous posts)

This has delayed my life, in many ways to the point it will ruin me forever. I am simply afraid I will commit to a career that leads me into an environment I am just not capabale of handling. My social "paralization" has already cost me years of my time because I was afraid to just go out and get a job. Now I have to commit to a college major and/or job that will most likely be a commitment for the rest of my life. I need some suggestions, or to know if anyone else has decided a college major based on some sort of handicap that you may have suffered from.

:eek:
 

Roy H.

Member
What are your interests?

History (I know, it's a terrible field - just teaching and some other stuff).

Politics.

Computers, because they're everywhere now.

I like golf and have researched putter design and found that machinists are the ones that make most of the stuff today, so machinist, as well.
 

Daniel E.

daniel@psychlinks.ca
Administrator
Computers, because they're everywhere now.

As you may know, some related majors for that are:
information systems (a combination of business and information technology. it is also called management information systems. Having a business perspective is really ideal for almost all IT jobs, which is why information systems is a good major, IMHO, with a lot of applicability.)
information technology
software engineering
computer science (heavy on theory)
 

Roy H.

Member
Can someone tell me how I should decide, or choose a career path, around my fear of social situations? I tend to feel very uncomfortable around people and want to know if I should (a) Choose a career based on my inability to feel comfortable with people or (b) Choose a career regardless and deal with any environment the career I choose leads me.


Sheeshe, am I not explaining myself right here???
 

Halo

Member
I think you are explaining yourself perfectly clear however you seem angry or annoyed that you haven't received the responses that you want. To be honest, I don't think that any of us on here can say for certain what career you should choose or what it should be based on. That is entirely a personal decision.

What I can say though is that I think if your fear of social situations is causing you that much anxiety in your life that it may be helpful for you to speak to a therapist about it. If you do see a therapist about this issue and get to the root cause then I believe it will then become more clear to you as to what career choices to make.
 

Roy H.

Member
I think you are explaining yourself perfectly clear however you seem angry or annoyed that you haven't received the responses that you want. To be honest, I don't think that any of us on here can say for certain what career you should choose or what it should be based on. That is entirely a personal decision.

What I can say though is that I think if your fear of social situations is causing you that much anxiety in your life that it may be helpful for you to speak to a therapist about it. If you do see a therapist about this issue and get to the root cause then I believe it will then become more clear to you as to what career choices to make.

I think you might be right. This is causing me a tremendous amount of suffering. Not only that, whenever I look in the paper for a job, the first thing I think about is the environment. Then 95% of the jobs are immediatly checked off the list. My life feels like a disaster.
 

moonriver

Member
I say do what you are interested in or where your passion lies and then you will get so interested in it, that your anxiety will in time become secondary. I am very shy myself but when I am confident in my job and what I am doing, my shyness doesnt seem as important of a concern. I still struggle with presentations and public speaking and I hate being embarassed but at least those moments are not all the time, so 90% of the time I am comfortable with my job.

My thought is too pick a job around your strengths, not your weaknesses. What are you good at, what gets you excited?
 
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Roy H.

Member
I say do what you are interested in or where your passion lies and then you will get so interested in it, that your anxiety will in time become secondary. I am very shy myself but when I am confident in my job and what I am doing, my shyness doesnt seem as important of a concern. I still struggle with presentations and public speaking and I hate being embarassed but at least those moments are not all the time, so 90% of the time I am comfortable with my job.

My thought is too pick a job around your strengths, not your weaknesses. What are you good at, what gets you excited?

Well, I'm not good at math. :eek: To be honest, I like writing - using creative words, etc. But I would also like to be able to move around and not be stuck in an office all day. Computers are also something that interest me, because literally everyone I know is computer illiterate, myself included. Also, I think the future is in computers.
 

Lana

Member
Have you tried using a different assessment approach? For example, instead of trying to cross out all jobs that involved aspects that make you uneasy, try circling the ones that you know you're qualified to do. Then, pick only those that you like to do and go from there. I find that when I like doing something, and if I focus on that, ther rest takes care of itself.
 

moonriver

Member
How about graphic design or desk top publishing? Then you could write, use computers and learn all the software associated with it plus come up with designs. I guess it would be a career change and you would have to go to a local college instead of a university, maybe you could switch to English and take the course later? I used to work in a publication company and the designers there made good money and most only had a two year diploma, then many also did freelancing.
 

Roy H.

Member
Have you tried using a different assessment approach? For example, instead of trying to cross out all jobs that involved aspects that make you uneasy, try circling the ones that you know you're qualified to do. Then, pick only those that you like to do and go from there. I find that when I like doing something, and if I focus on that, ther rest takes care of itself.

That's a good point.

How about graphic design or desk top publishing? Then you could write, use computers and learn all the software associated with it plus come up with designs. I guess it would be a career change and you would have to go to a local college instead of a university, maybe you could switch to English and take the course later? I used to work in a publication company and the designers there made good money and most only had a two year diploma, then many also did freelancing.

I'll have to look into that. I already have my liberal arts studies completed at a local community school, so I wonder how that will play into the process. I'll have to look into those fields.
 
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