braveheart
Member
In therapy just now we are working lots to uncover, understand, and release the hold the internalisation of my father and the bullies have over me.
I call this internalisation 'The Dictator'.
It has me where it wants me, depressed, submissive, self-hating, isolated...
And its a big Controller.
And its hard work facing it, accepting it, and gaining some strength to oppose its clutches.
Any tips/advice on coping with/overcoming internalisations of abusers?
[NB Complex PTSD from Wikipedia -- I've bolded the relevant parts..]
Thanks.
I call this internalisation 'The Dictator'.
It has me where it wants me, depressed, submissive, self-hating, isolated...
And its a big Controller.
And its hard work facing it, accepting it, and gaining some strength to oppose its clutches.
Any tips/advice on coping with/overcoming internalisations of abusers?
[NB Complex PTSD from Wikipedia -- I've bolded the relevant parts..]
Difficulties regulating emotions, including symptoms such as persistent sadness, suicidal thoughts, explosive anger, or inhibited anger
Variations in consciousness, such as forgetting traumatic events, reliving traumatic events, or having episodes of dissociation (during which one feels detached from one's mental processes or body)
Changes in self-perception, such as a sense of helplessness, shame, guilt, stigma, and a sense of being completely different from other human beings
Varied changes in the perception of the perpetrator, such as attributing total power to the perpetrator or becoming preoccupied with the relationship to the perpetrator, including a preoccupation with revenge
Alterations in relations with others, including isolation, distrust, or a repeated search for a rescuer
Loss of, or changes in, one's system of meanings, which may include a loss of sustaining faith or a sense of hopelessness and despair
Thanks.