Don't get a Blackberry and I am serious

[moonriver]

Hey Guys

Happy New Year

I thought it was time I checked in here, I cut off my internet a year ago because I found I spent so much time on it and being naturally shy, it was easier to have a relation with the computer than face the real world. Some time ago, in the course of my work, I was given a blackberry. Well, I loved it, I was back looking at the web adn checking e-mails, all the things that I missed. Catching up with this site and all the others.

But now everyone is telling me I am a crackberry addict. I constantly check my blackberry for messages and I got the internet at home again and I feel like I am checking my e-mail hundreds of times a day. At first it was fun, but now it is like a nagging itch, constantly hoping for that next message or hit of an e-mail. And the thing is, I dont even get any good messages, other than junk and promo offers for things.

I didnt see this coming, I am going to nip it in the bud but it got me curious, is this a symptom of OCD? I do have OCD, but I did not think it would manifest itself in this manner. I guess I dont know as much as I think about myself. Do you think it is ok to check for emails this many times? Sheesh i just logged on again here, maybe I need it more than I realize?

 

[Jazzey]

I'm not a mental health expert Moonriver. I too have a blackberry for work. I guess I agree with you that it can be a smidge addictive. When I first got it, I was so opposed. Mostly because it meant that my employer "had me" (so to speak) 24 hours a day. Now, I've learnt to appreciate its practicality...When I go home at night, I turn it off. It's also off on the weekends. And yet, I can tell you that the blackberry saved me from a major trip 'cross country last night- it's how my employer communicated with me (finally) to let me know that the trip I'd planned all day was finally called off. It's also how my loved ones know how to get a hold of me during work hours...

Moonriver - a blackberry is yet just another tool - it's up to us to determine its boundaries. When I'm with those that I want to spend time with, without interruption, the power button is pushed almost immediately - nothing is that urgent...

 

[moonriver]

Thanks for the reminder of that Jazzey, although in my head I know you are right and I do try turning it off but it is like a itch that I have to scratch, I have to keep checking it or it drives me crazy. If I am doing something, I just dont feel right until I have checked it again and I dont even know why. I can even be holding it in my hand and I still feel like I need to check it again. I lie awake at night and I have to get out of bed to go check the stupid thing. Can you beleive what an idiot I am, I even left it down in my car so it would be hard for me to check it and I got up in the middle of the night to go get it because it bothered me.

Only thing left to do is cancel it I am afraid or throw it into a lake: Yes, I realize as I am typing this that I am a tad obsessed.mg:

 

[Jazzey]

Just remind yourself that's it's only intended as a tool of communication - that's it. I do understand the obsession (just trust me ) - If I may suggest - just make a rigid schedule as to when it's on and, when it's off - and stick to it...You don't have to cancel it. Just recognize that it's just another tool of communication, nothing more, nothing less.

Do you carry your cordless phone around with you? I don't think so...Your blackberry is the equivalent - so set a schedule and, stick to it. At first it'll be a little more difficult, but if you stick with it, within a week, you'll really wonder why it seemed so difficult...Just a 'tool for communication' -that's it. Nothing more or less important than your cordless phone....

 

[moonriver]

That is really excellent and practical advice Jazzey, I know this is trivial and silly and I am shaking my head imagining you on the computer at the other end going what is wrong with this person.

I have never been able to understand how I get so addicted to doing repetitive things. The only way I can explain it is to liken it to wearing one of those itchy sweaters that makes your skin turn red and then to be told that you are not allowed to scratch but you have to keep the sweater on. As soon as you think you can't scratch, it makes you even more itchy and all you want to do is rip off that sweater and throw it out to get rid of that itch. That is what my entire life feels like, moving from one itchy sweater to the next

Well, it could be alot worse..

 

[Jazzey]

No Moonriver, I promise that I'm not questioning what you're going through. I have spent many 'sleepless' nights playing with my 'new' technological' tools. But, eventually at least, I was able to step back and recognize that they are 'just' that - tools.

At some point, I had to become a little more responsible for my own health...I don't mean that in a demeaning way at all. I just think that, at times, we have to decide how our priorities work - the blackberry - way down on my list of priorities during my 'off' hours..

 

[Lana]

I used to have a blackberry for work also. At first, I kept forgetting to check it, and if someone called me (it had a phone too), I'd always think it's someone else's phone...and eventually realizing that it was mine and for me. :red:

I think when it's work related, it's harder to get that hooked on it. The reason is that in those instances, when blackberry goes off, it means work. So, I don't think I got that attached and was too happy to give it up. However, what your describing is similar to what I went through when quitting smoking. The minute the decision was made to quit, a whole pack wasn't enough to quench the craving. Ugh...awful (and expensive!) habit.

There does seem to be a strong dependence on blackberry. Jazzy gave you some very good points so I can't really add to that. But, as an ex-smoker, I can tell you that the feelings you get when you try to quit blackberry, are similar. The only thing I can add is that you really have to want to quit it. If you think you "should" quit, but don't really "want" to quit, it may explain why it's difficult to cut yourself off from checking it.

 

[Daniel E.]

BTW:

For some people, an everyday habit of checking Facebook on your new BlackBerry (a.k.a. CrackBerry) can turn into a full-blown compulsion in a matter of weeks...

Researchers at Carnegie Mellon University’s Human Computer Interaction Institute coined the term “Internet paradox” in 1998 to explain this phenomenon. The term refers to the contradictory nature of the Internet: many use the web as a tool to develop and maintain relationships, but doing this through the use of a computer ironically leads to a lack of commitment to face-to-face relationships.

Caught in the Net

In summary, there's a circuitry for 'seeking' and a circuitry for 'liking'. The 'liking' response settles down the excitement of the 'seeking' circuitry. Without the 'liking' response, we end up looking like the rat that keeps pressing the level over and over to get a little dopamine hit, forgetting all about food and rest.

http://forum.psychlinks.ca/internet...ve-google-twitter-and-texting.html#post158147

When paying partial continuous attention, people may place their brains in a heightened state of stress. They no longer have time to reflect, contemplate or make thoughtful decisions. Instead, they exist in a sense of constant crisis - on alert for a new contact or bit of exciting news or information at any moment.

Techno-Brain Burnout

Don't leave a hole where a bad habit used to be. Sometimes substituting new, improved behaviors for old bad ones will help.

Tips on Breaking Bad Habits

If you're suffering, however, take the broad view. Rather than seeking trendy cures for "Internet addiction," consult with a professional who can help you define the problem specifically. Once you define the problem specifically, it's much easier to find the right kind of help.

Keeping -- Or Not Keeping -- Your Internet Use Under Control

 

[moonriver]

Thanks all of you, Jazzey, Lana, Daniel, you all have given me some great tips and Lana you are right of course, you have to want to quit and I do. I will take this to heart and strive to do better.

Thanks for everything. If you were all here I would take you all for lunch. :thankyou2::thankyou2::thankyou2:

 

[SilentNinja]

wow moonriver you sound just like me! lol,

I have e-mail set up on my phone and check it over 100 times a day, if i wake up in the night, i grab my phone and check for e-mails, i have to or i cant settle, i check e-mail on the PC all the time, Im not even expecting anything but i check ALL the time! drives me crazy! I dont like social networking sites they make my angry, Ive deleted my FB over 20 times! but i just have this problem with checking e-mail and talking to my friend, if i dont hear from him, my whole day i am paranoid!