Don't know where to turn awwwwwwww

[Laurie1407]

:helpme:

I am soooooooooooooo anxious this morning even panicky feel like Im losing control and don't know where to turn for help anymore.

So down and depressed ,my life sucks and I feel so trapped. My house is a mess I can't focus on anthing but this computer right now. I just wish I could turn back time and start my life over again or maybe not I really don't know.

If I could just shut off my brain and not have to think.

I guess I should call my doctor, but then I think why? whats the point?

I can't leave my home because of the agoraphobia,I can't consentrate on anything, I can't even clean up my house, I feel so useless, worthless just plain nothingness is what I am. I have been through 2 out patient programs at two different hospitals and have had 1 on 1 CBT and still I sit here a mess I just don't get it. I've been told well maybe you are not ready to get it. Then I ask will I ever am I a lost cause what wrong with me why can't I be fixed?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

First, try taking a few long slow breaths, in and out, and focusing ONLY on your breathing to try to clear your mind.

Then, remind me what medications you have been prescribed currently. I seem to remember that one of them was a tranquilizer but that may have been someone else...

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Thanks for sending me that list, Laurie. I see you have taken the extra dose of one of them as your doctor suggested It may take a while for that to bring down your anxiety.

You might also call your doctor's office for advice on what else you can do with the medications s/he's prescribed if the anxiety remains high.

 

[Laurie1407]

Thanks For your support Doc
I hope you don't mind if I call you that by the way.
It's nice to have another life line to reach out to.
Yes I think I will call my Doctor let him know whats happening and such.
Thanks
:hug:
Laurie

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Not at all.

 

[sister-ray]

Laurie,

I do understand how you feel I get attacks like yours and I know that feeling of feeling like your going to loose it, it will pass, I usually try and distract myself, listening to music, watching something on tv, listening to my meditation tapes just anything to take my mind of it, but I know thats hard if your having concentration problems, can you open a window and breath in some fresh air that sometimes helps me, if you can call someone and chat that would be good too, i do hope you feel a bit better soon:hug::hug:

 

[Laurie1407]

Thanks through-these-eyes
I have called a friend and also contacted my Dr's office so I hope to hear from him this afternoon.I am trying the distraction thing I put on some laundry and will try to keep this crazy mind of mind busy until I talk to him.thanks for your support it means so much:hug:
Laurie

Just wondering what your opions are about this...
My hubby thinks and I'm starting to think about as well that maybe I need to go into the hospital to get help with PTSD. What do you think is this a good thing?

 

[David Baxter PhD]

The first question that any physician would need to answer is whether you need to be in hospital, as opposed to managing your condition as an outpatient. Hospital beds in Ontario are in very short supply. You may not meet the criteria for admission at this time.

In any case, this would be something else to ask your doctor.

 

[braveheart]

I've never been in hospital for my PTSD, although have felt close to the edge a number of times. I've also had some pretty severe panic attacks, and know how frightening they can be.
It can be uncomfortable, but also liberating, I find, to understand more about triggers and gradually slow mind down.

 

[Laurie1407]

I decided not to go to the hospital.
I feel so what better this afternoon, talked to my doctor and he had me stop my new meds and go back to my previous ones.
He is also signing me up for a Panic & anxiety out patient program at the royal.It starts iin January.
I told him I don't know how I will get there and he just told me I basically I had to push myself out of my house and find away to get there.
Thinking of this scares the crap out of me,getting into a vehicle with a stranger is one of my fears.So I don't know how I will deal with getting to the program once a week.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

Would it be possible for your husband or a friend or family member to drive you? It is only once a week, as you say...

 

[Laurie1407]

Hi Doc
No my hubby can't take the time off work it's a new job and I don't have any family or friends that could drive me.
My doctor told me I would just have to get there myself via taxi or para transpo but the thought of either if these scares the hell out of me but I guess I don't have a choice.But I know from now until then that is all I will be thinking about.

Laurie

 

[sister-ray]

Laurie,

Its horrid when you have no one to take you anywhere and have to rely on taxis and all the worry about it all I feel the same. I lost my helper over a year ago due to lack of funds/places closing down/tighter critera with the support services here, and have been shopping and doing stuff alone using taxis, it has got a bit easier over the year but I still feel ill the night before, and get panic if something goes wrong or doesnt go to plan, i do have a friend but due to commitments he cannot help alot, just wanted to say I understand :hug::hug:

 

[Laurie1407]

Thanks It's nice to know there is someone out there who understands
:friends:
Laurie

 

[Laurie1407]

hi Doc
Does CBT really help with PTSD ?
I been through it before and have lots of tools but they just don't seem to click with me when I feel fearful.

Laurie

 

[ladylore]

Hi Laurie,

I caught up on this particular thread - I thought I would drop in say hi and let you know I have PTSD too.

As for CBT it has worked for me - as in, when I am having a tough time I know longer expect perfection and not get myself into that place, in the first place. CBT has allowed me to be kinder to myself as all those messages (old tapes) don't play as much.

Glad your here. :hug:

 

[Messiahmonkey]

Laurie,

Don't worry mate your not the only one who does not clean..i have not vacumed for like months ...lol...hey i only shower like once every 2 weeks and wash me cloths like once every 4-5 months..lol