Little_Girl_Blue
Member
I've been having these episodes a few times a week...I'm not quite sure what they are. Since I haven't been able to make that appointment with a doctor, I'd appreciate any tips/advice/information any of you could give me.
In these episodes, I feel extremely destabilized, my stomach filled with the most horrible feeling I've ever had - worse than that lingering emptiness we all feel at some point. It's like fear mixed with disgust and intense guilt. Something like that. Sometimes I feel jittery just under the surface of my skin - I can usually handle that. But this practically all-consuming. I feel like something horrible is going to happen, yet logically I know it won't. I simply feel as if I can't stay in my body - as if I can't live with myself. And I fear it won't stop and that I'll lose control and will be like that forever. It takes about 10 minutes for me to get over it. I did my best today and didn't make that cut - I waited it out and just grabbed my head, rocked back and forth on the floor (gosh that sounds insane). It doesn't feel strong enough to be a panic attack (I don't think I've had those), but it's still horrible. I even skipped work today because I was afraid it would happen again there (well, there were other practical reasons as to why I skipped work
).
Is there any way to prevent these things from happening? I started getting these over winter, but they seem to be getting worse. I'm not here for pity parties or self-esteem boosts. I just want to regain control over myself.
Thanks for listening!
In these episodes, I feel extremely destabilized, my stomach filled with the most horrible feeling I've ever had - worse than that lingering emptiness we all feel at some point. It's like fear mixed with disgust and intense guilt. Something like that. Sometimes I feel jittery just under the surface of my skin - I can usually handle that. But this practically all-consuming. I feel like something horrible is going to happen, yet logically I know it won't. I simply feel as if I can't stay in my body - as if I can't live with myself. And I fear it won't stop and that I'll lose control and will be like that forever. It takes about 10 minutes for me to get over it. I did my best today and didn't make that cut - I waited it out and just grabbed my head, rocked back and forth on the floor (gosh that sounds insane). It doesn't feel strong enough to be a panic attack (I don't think I've had those), but it's still horrible. I even skipped work today because I was afraid it would happen again there (well, there were other practical reasons as to why I skipped work
Is there any way to prevent these things from happening? I started getting these over winter, but they seem to be getting worse. I'm not here for pity parties or self-esteem boosts. I just want to regain control over myself.
Thanks for listening!