Fear

[Ashley-Kate]

hello, i have been going from 1 destructive behavior to another from but now as i struggle with so many others i find myself resulting to use of prescription pills not to get high or anything but to stop all the pain in my life I mix many things together because i was often sick and before being someone that refused many medical stuff i never took the pill but now with all the ones i have left i use them up i take all the way to antibiotics to anti inflammatories to morphine tylenol aspirin anything to make me feel tiered calm i know is it not good for me especially do to my past problem but i am really depressed and feel that that is the only thing that keeps me alive.
what to do
yours truly ashley

 

[g-scared]

ashley-kate
your behavior is very self-destructive, and i fear for you. but ultimately, you will not get better unless you want to.

i am almost at a loss of what to say because it seems like you are completely cognisant of the events taking place and how they hurt you, yet you continue. sounds like an addiction if i've ever heard of one. fortunately you have a good support structure it seems. you just have to reach out. For now they are just waiting, patiently and fearfully.

maybe there are some triggers, like your dad that you get exposed to frequently? maybe you should try to avoid things like this, and focus on yourself.

good luck.