Hello, everyone!

[Earthquake]

I'm young, struggling, and looking for a place to socialize and seek advice occasionally. I'm homeless and generally lonely, dealing with addiction and what I believe to be depression. I have a history of physical, verbal and emotional abuse. My life has always been way harder than it should. I have intrusive thoughts and have suspected for years now that I have OCD. I'm not in therapy now and I don't have health insurance. I'm all on my own.

That's all I have to share at this very moment. Thanks for having me.

 

[Retired]

Welcome Earthquake. Let us know how we can help.

 

[forgetmenot]

Hi Earthquake sorry you feel so alone hope coming here will help that some welcome to Psychlinks

 

[rdw]

Welcome to the forum Earthquake!

 

[MHealthJo]

So sorry to hear about the situation you are facing Earthquake and the things you have faced in the past. Hope we can offer some ideas or free resources, or be helpful in terms of just chatting / friendly faces.

Wondering, how linked-up are you with things like free or low-cost community services, advice services, support services, etc? Different parts of the world have different things to offer.... Community noticeboards, libraries and information centres, or places where fliers and advertisements are posted, are often good places to look around at regularly.

Even when a situation seems hopeless, it can be quite surprising how small things and little bits of support can over time, add together and be helpful to our situation.

 

[GDPR]

Welcome Earthquake.

 

[PrincessX]

Hello earthquake, welcome. Sorry to hear about your struggles. As MHealth Jo suggested, try to find some resources in your community, that may help you improve your life, as they say to get the wheel rolling. Anyone can get healthier with proper healthcare, food and housing. Hopefully with time, you could also start thinking of casual employment or volunteering. It will take will to change and some fight on your side.

 

[Earthquake]

Thank you, everyone.

I do have access to some free stuff that might help me, but I never feel motivated to take advantage. A lot of times I don't even know how. I don't know anything about healthcare, welfare and all that. The staff at the shelter I'm staying in are suppose to help me but so far, not so good. They're unemphatic and don't really seem to do anything. Some of the other women say that we're basically on our own; the staff are just there to punish us by putting us out in the street if we don't constantly provide proof that we're actually working toward independent living.

When I read certain fliers for services that might help me, it's like reading another language. A lot of times, I'm not eligible for help because I'm TOO poor. It sucks. For example, I can't even get financial aid for college. Why? Because I have no income. Never had one. Apparently I'm too needy to be needy.

It's hopeless. But I'll take baby steps. Saving what little money I come across (if I can ever find the willpower), applying for health insurance (when I find out exactly how), and... well, I NEED to get a job soon, or they'll kick me out, but I've never worked before and I don't have any skills that I can prove I have. And I'm 23, so people wonder, "What's wrong with you? Why haven't you ever worked?" And I can't answer honestly: "Because I'm a lazy, ignorant pothead. Oh, and I'm losing my mind."

 

[Earthquake]

Never mind. I did some digging through my brain and I think I know how/where to apply for medical insurance. There's a free clinic in my city where social workers help you do that. Maybe if I go to the same place where I applied for food stamps, I can do it there, too. And I remember someone telling me that I can apply at any hospital.

I've done it before, actually, with help of some workers at a drop-in center I go to sometimes. But it got cut off because I couldn't keep any appointments or answer my mail. I have to travel so far to the drop-in center (which is also my mailing address), and all the instructions and demands are too confusing and overwhelming. Go here. Go there. Bring these documents. Fill this out. Sign that. And I don't always get my mail on time, I don't always have money to travel, and I almost never understand what they're telling me to do. So my insurance was cut off because of somewhere I didn't go or whatever.

Ridiculous. And my genius of a father never got me any real professional help as a child, so it's not like I have it on record and can prove to anyone that I have a history of being easily overwhelmed/confused and am nearly incapable of taking care of myself. So there's no excuse for me, as far as anyone else is concerned. They think I just don't care. They don't understand that they're just asking me for too much.

 

[MHealthJo]

It's really great that you were able to remember some steps, Earthquake.

One of the most challenging things in these circumstances is the difficulty of actually getting the ball rolling to get help, when we have the physical or mental challenges that have put us where we are.

Keep in touch with whatever services seem interested in helping you, and make sure you describe what your challenges are as best you can. Someone like the social worker might be good for helping you work out what tips can be useful for you... seeing if they can hook you up with a couple of paper folders, notebook or organiser or something, jotting down notes to remember what to do next, etc. I'm no stranger to confusion and fogginess, I feel ya.

Keep taking little steps, we are behind you. And watch out for pitfalls or decisions that could hinder you - keep looking ahead and gradually you will move in that direction.