hello from a Canadian gal

[Kalina Miranda]

Hello PsychLinks members,

I am not sure what to say.... hmm... I haven't discussed my issues with anyone really.

I will have a look around and once I feel comfortable maybe I will feel like opening up.

I struggle with social anxiety disorder, which basically makes my life a living hell, everything from talking to people in person or on the phone, meeting people, being in crowds, everything you can imagine, is a big deal. I'd prefer it not to be. I even fainted on New Years eve cause of it and landed face first on a driveway, nice way to start the new year, all banged up, cut up and bruised. This was due to being forced to be at a party I did not want to be at..way too many people, I do not party... I feel best staying home.

Anyway, just saying hello!

K-

 

[ThatLady]

Hello, Kalina! It's great to have you with us!

I'm so sorry about your New Year's eve fall. That really is a terrible way to start the new year. I can understand how difficult it must have been for you to even go to the party in the first place. I don't like parties either; nor, do I care for crowds of people, or talking on telephones. So...you're not alone, hon. )

 

[Kalina Miranda]

Thank you ThatLady.

I live with my boyfriend and he went to visit his father for New Years in a different province so his mother didn't want me to be alone. She asked if I was ok with going to the neighbors party and I bascially made it obvious I wasn't and she still insisted I go.

Sure it's a nice gesture and thought, but she's known me almost 10 years and the nice thing anyone can do is let me do what makes me comfortable, I was fine with staying home alone for once and seeing the countdown on tv.

I ended up going to this party, where I know like 3 people out of 30-40. I had a few drinks to help my nerves, I don't drink either so that made me sick. That combined with anxiety, made me have the accident, I went to sit outside for fresh air and just fell right over I guess.

It would be nice if everyone understood and didn't make others do things they don't want.

PLUS - I got a lecture from one guy about being quiet and had 2 other's comment that I am quiet. Geesh, I tried, I was there, I was smiling. I don't need it pointed out that I am quiet, it made me feel worse. That was my New Years from hell.

 

[HA]

Welcome Kalina,

What a rotten New Year start. Personally, I find shyness to be an endearing quality. When shyness becomes anxiety to the degree that you experience it, then it gets in the way of you having and enjoyable life. The good news is that social anxiety is very treatable.
Here is a page of resources for you to read through.

http://www.psychlinks.ca/pages/shyness.htm

Cheers
HeartArt

 

[Kalina Miranda]

Thank you HeartArt, that link is very helpful to me.

K-

 

[Cybil2U]

Welcome Kalina

Hi Kalina and welcome.

I'm with you and That Lady as far as dealing with large groups of people, parties. I use to wait until 8:20 am to go into cafeteria to get coffee - that way everyone had pretty much left - sounds silly but when I would force myself to walk in there when it was full, I would get all shakey and palms of hands would sweat or I'd take two steps in and panic and turn around and go back to my office......and it truly impacts everyday life and confines/limits a person........I'm sure you will find the information and members here to be very supportive and helpful and again, Welcome!

 

[Kalina Miranda]

Hello Cybil2U,

Thanks for the welcome, and I can relate to what you just said, except with me it's more one on one. I don't mind a room full of people, cause then they're usually all busy talking to someone else, but if I were to go in and there's few people they may want to chat with me and that's where my issues lie.

Again, thanks for the welcome.

K-