Hey

[BlueCrystal]

I have been lurking a little bit on this forum.. why I decided to sign up, well I'm not really as everyone else and I might find like-minded people here that have same issues as me, I dunno.

I'm male, 21 years old. I'm often quite anxious, I'm afriad of things, I create new phobias easily. I'm kinda afraid of strange situations and somwehat uncomfortable with changings. Also I'm kinda awkward in social situations.. I find it kinda hard how I should behave myself and what to say, as well I'm very shy.

I have very one-sided interests... I'm sitting at my computer like 95% of the days (yes I know I'm a quite boring person )

Also a little note, my sexual side is kinda.. unusual. I have a so-called paraphilia. Well I will not go into detail on that since I think some people here may find such things sensitive or disgusting.

However, I'm not that sure why I am like I am... what I know, when I was about 15 years old I got a diagnos of a doctor, I think it said something about asperger..

Anyhow I hope I can find this forum useful to parhaps get rid of some of my issues

 

[white page]

Hi Blue crystal

Welcome to psychlinks , there are many article you may find interesting , have a look around.

Whilst only face to face work with a therapist can help you with your issues.

We are here to listen to you, and support your steps in seeking that help with a therapist.

best wishes and looking forward to seeing you around wp

 

[Retired]

Hello BlueCrystal,

Welcome to Psychlinks.

Hope you can find some information here that might point you in the right direction for dealing with some of the issues you described.

I hope I can find this forum useful to parhaps get rid of some of my issues

All we can do is perhaps provide some suggestions as to where help might be available. It would be up to you to seek out those resources to get the help you need.

Are you being followed by a doctor or therapist at this time?

paraphilia. Well I will not go into detail on that since I think some people here may find such things sensitive or disgusting

Refrain from posting graphic details because graphic details will be deleted, according to Psychlinks Forum rules

 

[Budoaiki]

Hi BlueCrystal,

welcome to psychlinks.

 

[ladylore]

Welcome.

 

[NicNak]

:hithere: BlueCrystal. :welcome: to Psychlinks.

 

[BlueCrystal]

I would like to point out, when I describe my issues at once like this it may sound like I have really big problems. But the case is I don't always suffer by this, and when I do, it's (in most cases) not that extremely much.

I would shortly discribe myself as a person with a "mild" asperger (but it may still be strong at some things and in some situations).

I don't think it would be a good idea to seek such help as a therapist.. I think I'm not "abnormal" enough for that. I don't know.

I want to take it easy as it is now.. I want to find out more and "learn to know" myself better first.

Maybe some here can share experiences with me which can be useful to think about when I get those issues.

Refrain from posting graphic details because graphic details will be deleted, according to

I saw that rule. I was not going to post anything graphical anyway.

Actually my paraphilia is quite innocent, it's not even "disgusting" I guess, but the sexuality has always been a sensetive subject, specially when it's not about the "normal".. why I mentioned about it was because I think it might be good for you to know everything about me

Oh.. and thanks for the welcomes

 

[white page]

Thank you Blue Crystal for the clarification.

I do hope you will find the resources here helpful

best wishes wp

 

[Jazzey]

Hi BC,

And welcome to Psychlinks ...

I don't think it would be a good idea to seek such help as a therapist.. I think I'm not "abnormal" enough for that. I don't know.

None of us are 'abnormal' BC. But some of us do have issues that require guidance and support from a trained professional - they provide us with tools and knowledge to take better care of ourselves.

 

[BlueCrystal]

None of us are 'abnormal' BC.

I know but that's why I wrote "abnormal" within those " apostrophe

But some of us do have issues that require guidance and support from a trained professional - they provide us with tools and knowledge to take better care of ourselves.

Since my issues is not that strong, I hope some guidance may help through the forums.

 

[Jazzey]

I know but that's why I wrote "abnormal" within those " apostrophe

I know BC. But I did want to point it out. While I won't take offense to it, certain terminologies, such as 'abnormal' can be insensitive for some people.

And I don't know what you mean that your issues "aren't that strong". A few short months ago, I too did not think that I needed the help of a therapist - no issues here that warranted assistance. Now I am seeing a psychologist and I'm grateful that I was open enough to do this for myself. Sometimes it's just nice to have the objective perception in our life- someone to bounce our thoughts with and someone who will offer us possible solutions or coping mechanisms for the harder stuff in our life.

One of the greatest misconceptions about psychology, I think, is this idea that it's only for people who have "really big issues"...But what is that really? How one defines "big issues" is really subjective to that person. Any issue that harms your quality of life, in any way, deserves to be looked at and, is important enough to address. And honestly, addressing some of these issues by ourselves, again in my opinion, is just an invitation to keep that issue tied to ourselves - we're too ingrained in our way of thinking, our own patterns.

In any event BC, this site promotes self-knowledge and education about psychology and psychiatry. The mere fact that you're here, that you're seeking information about your issues, is an indication that they're important to you.

I just can't support you in distinguishing between what you've termed "strong" issues versus others. Any issue affecting your life is worthy of help. And I will also remind you (gently) to make sure you're familiar with the forum rules. Particularly this one :

In addition, the following are expressly prohibited on this Forum: POSTS THAT ARE ANTI-PSYCHIATRY OR ANTI-MEDICINE IN NATURE (there are other forums where you can engage in such debates -- this is not one of them).

 

[BlueCrystal]

One of the greatest misconceptions about psychology, I think, is this idea that it's only for people who have "really big issues"...But what is that really?

Well apart from my not so strong issues I have some big ones.. an issue I have which started for about over a year ago, I got a strange anxiety of eating food. I losed about 15% of my weight in just about 2 weeks because I didn't eat that much anymore.
The strange is, I WANT to eat but I can't sometimes.

If I go out and eat with friends, they sometimes ask why I why I don't eat my food and I just simple asnwers "I'm not hungry anymore" but the truth is I am hungry, but I can't eat, well I can but it takes forever.

Strange isn't it? This is an issue I find extremely embarrassing and haven't told anyone.
Actually it's so weird so I don't even think you here on the site will understand it :S

In any event BC, this site promotes self-knowledge and education about psychology and psychiatry. The mere fact that you're here, that you're seeking information about your issues, is an indication that they're important to you.

They are kind of important for me yes. I'm still unemployed and I don't have a drive license, that because of my "strong" issues as I call them.

I just can't support you in distinguishing between what you've termed "strong" issues versus others. Any issue affecting your life is worthy of help. And I will also remind you (gently) to make sure you're familiar with the forum rules. Particularly this one :

In addition, the following are expressly prohibited on this Forum: POSTS THAT ARE ANTI-PSYCHIATRY OR ANTI-MEDICINE IN NATURE (there are other forums where you can engage in such debates -- this is not one of them).

Well I will stop saying "stong" issues then.
You know I'm still kinda a amateur about all this so I'm not sure what to call everything and all that.

About that rule.. I'm not sure I got it actually, what exactly does it mean?

 

[Jazzey]

Well apart from my not so strong issues I have some big ones.. an issue I have which started for about over a year ago, I got a strange anxiety of eating food. I losed about 15% of my weight in just about 2 weeks because I didn't eat that much anymore.
The strange is, I WANT to eat but I can't sometimes.

If I go out and eat with friends, they sometimes ask why I why I don't eat my food and I just simple asnwers "I'm not hungry anymore" but the truth is I am hungry, but I can't eat, well I can but it takes forever.

Strange isn't it? This is an issue I find extremely embarrassing and haven't told anyone.

Not strange to me at all BC...I do the exact same thing . It's part of my anxiety problems...I think. I can go starving to the grocery store, and come back with a litre of milk only. I think it's tied to my anxiety but haven't yet discovered its true source...

They are kind of important for me yes. I'm still unemployed and I don't have a drive license, that because of my "strong" issues as I call them.

Thank you BC . This is exactly what I meant - they're important to you. They obviously affect you and your life. And, without wanting to push you towards therapy (you have to want it and be ready to really consider it), I think these are all things that a competent psychologist could help you with. And thanks again BC for being honest with me.

Well I will stop saying "stong" issues then.
You know I'm still kinda a amateur about all this so I'm not sure what to call everything and all that.

About that rule.. I'm not sure I got it actually, what exactly does it mean?

Sorry BC - that's my fault. I should have explained a little more. I don't take offense to your calling them "strong issues". I just don't want you to post things that discourage people from seeking therapy. Seeking therapy is really an individual choice. We get it when we're ready for it, when we're ready to tackle some of our issues. The danger with labelling things "strong" issues or not, is that it gives people a false idea that some issues need therapy while others don't. But none of us, other than trained professionals, are in a situation where we can really accurately assess what needs to be addressed. That's why I said in my previous post - a few short months ago, I too thought that I didn't need therapy - that my issues weren't important enough. But they were important - they were and are affecting my life, the way I see myself, the way I live my life, the coping mechanisms that I've chosen to deal with these issues. My therapist helps me to deal with all of these issues and enables me to be healthier in my thinking.

So, what does it mean? Please feel free to ask any and all questions. I just didn't want you to discourage therapy for other members here. Therapy is useful and can really be a saving grace for many people, myself included.

 

[Halo]

Hi BC and welcome to Psychlinks :welcome2:

 

[BlueCrystal]

Not strange to me at all BC...I do the exact same thing . It's part of my anxiety problems...I think.

lol.. serious.. you too? Well maybe I'm not that weird anymore then.
Hmm but it may still be for different reasons.. what's your thoughts when that happens?

I think it's tied to my anxiety but haven't yet discovered its true source...

Actually I know were my source problem started, one of my relatives got into a tragedy 2 years ago, she became bounded to a wheelchair and is almost 100% lame.
Someone needs to feed her when she eats, and she can hardly shew and swallow since she is lame. It was so painful to watch, so I created a anxiety to eat myself.

It's weird... very weird.... but I guess since I have more or less asperger and anxiety, it may be because of that.

Thank you BC . This is exactly what I meant - they're important to you. They obviously affect you and your life. And, without wanting to push you towards therapy (you have to want it and be ready to really consider it), I think these are all things that a competent psychologist could help you with. And thanks again BC for being honest with me.

The unemployed thing is something I'm kind of working on already.. I couldn't keep my last 2 jobs because I had difficulty to understand what my colleagues told me to do, and I didn't understand the tasks.
(I have very hard to listen to someone that tells a task to me verbal, it's probably due to my form of asperger).

Anyway, as I said in my very first post, I got a diagnos from a doctor many years ago, but I'm not sure what it said, and I can't find it. However I need to look for it until I find it and show it for employment service, so they can take consideration to that when they recommend jobs for me.

Sorry BC - that's my fault. I should have explained a little more. I don't take offense to your calling them "strong issues". I just don't want you to post things that discourage people from seeking therapy. Seeking therapy is a really an individual choice. We get it when we're ready for it, when we're ready to tackle some of our issues. The danger with labelling things "strong" issues or not, is that it gives people a false idea that some issues need therapy while others don't. But none of us, other than trained professionals, are in a situation where we can really accurately assess what needs to be addressed. That's why I said in my previous post - a few short months ago, I too thought that I didn't need therapy - that my issues weren't important enough. But they were important - they were / are affecting my life, the way I see myself, the way I live my life, the coping mechanisms that I've chosen to deal with these issues. My therapist helps me to deal with all of these issues and enables me to be healthier in my thinking.

So, what does it mean? Please feel free to ask any and all questions. I just didn't want you to discourage therapy for other members here. Therapy is useful and can really be a saving grace for many people, myself included.

Ok, I see.
Well I have not much to add here since I think what you said is correct.

 

[Jazzey]

lol.. serious.. you too? Well maybe I'm not that weird anymore then.
Hmm but it may still be for different reasons.. what's your thoughts when that happens?

Yup, me too. I think for me though it has to do with depression and anxiety. When I'm really in the throws of it, while I may be hungry, I literally can't swallow food. That normal function of swallowing isn't there for me.

When I'm grocery shopping - I start getting anxious about being uncertain of what to buy for the week. The more anxious I get, the more I can't make a decision. Milk is a safe bet - I know I'll need that for my coffee in the morning. It just means that I end up going to the grocery store more often than I would want to...Did I mention that I absolutely hate grocery shopping?

I'm sorry to hear about your relative BC. And thank you for understanding my position on the terms that we use around here.

The unemployed thing is something I'm kind of working on already.. I couldn't keep my last 2 jobs because I had difficulty to understand what my colleagues told me to do, and I didn't understand the tasks.
(I have very hard to listen to someone that tells a task to me verbal, it's probably due to my form of asperger).

Anyway, as I said in my very first post, I got a diagnos from a doctor many years ago, but I'm not sure what it said, and I can't find it. However I need to look for it until I found it and show it for employment service, so they can take consideration to that when they recommend jobs for me.

I like that you're being proactive here BC. That's a really good sign. Maybe you need to look a little more deeply into your diagnosis to understand what accommodations you may need in an employment situation?

 

[BlueCrystal]

When I'm really in the throws of it, while I may be hungry, I literally can't swallow food. That normal function of swallowing isn't there for me.

That's EXACTLY for me too, I can't swallow food how hard I try.
Never thought I was going to talk with someone with the same problem.. in worse case I need to swallow it with some water.

Also for me it vary, sometimes I can swallow and sometimes not.

Thank you, I would never be this open without someone telling the same problem first..
lol I think that's a kind of anxiety I have too, I find it very hard to be open, even if it's on the internet..

When I'm grocery shopping - I start getting anxious about being uncertain of what to buy for the week. The more anxious I get, the more I can't make a decision. Milk is a safe bet - I know I'll need that for my coffee in the morning. It just means that I end up going to the grocery store more often than I would want to...Did I mention that I absolutely hate grocery shopping?

I'm still living with my parents so I almost never go to the grocery shop, I have very small amount of expirence here.

I hate grocery shopping too, that's why I let my parents buy everything (I make use of that while I can! lol), however my reason to why I dislike it, is because I feel uncomfortable to be in shops with a lot of people.

I'm sorry to hear about your relative BC. And thank you for understanding my position on the terms that we use around here.

Well you are a lot more expirenced than me here so I trust in what you are saying

I like that you're being proactive here BC. That's a really good sign. Maybe you need to look a little more deeply into your diagnosis to understand what accommodations you may need in an employment situation?

Yes, I need to look at them (since I don't remember!), that's why I'm looking for them, I know they should be somewhere in a shelf. If there stands anything that can help me to get a job, I will show it for the employment service.

 

[Jazzey]

You're on the right track BC :2thumbs: And again, welcome to Psychlinks.

Take a look around the forum, there are some great threads on asperger's and please, feel free to ask questions. I'm going to log off soon - but I'm really happy that we had this chat tonight BC Goodnight.

 

[texasgirl]

Welcome, Blue Crystal. Look forward to hearing from you.

:wave:

TG

 

[BlueCrystal]

You're on the right track BC :2thumbs: And again, welcome to Psychlinks.

Take a look around the forum, there are some great threads on asperger's and please, feel free to ask questions. I'm going to log off soon - but I'm really happy that we had this chat tonight BC Goodnight.

Thanks, and ye I will. : )

Very nice to talk to you, already now I have got a much better understanding in my issues! Thanks again!

And thanks people for the welcomes. : )

Well time for me to log off as well, goodnight!