How to understand people quickly?

[lotaloi]

Members,
I wish to recognize people quickly I meant their traits or nature etc. Let's say I'm with a person that I want to know how good or bad he/she is. I make mistake to recognize people often specially girls. How can I understand them well when only talking and chatting is possible or done? More eye contact or what else? Pl help.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I'm not sure I really understand your question but:

1. most people aren't that hard to understand, if you take a little time to listen to them
2. there is no magic potion or technique that will give you a shortcut to understanding people fully and quickly

 

[Banned]

Also, "first impressions" can often be very different from "ongoing impressions". Everybody wants to impress other people and be liked...I think we all have a certain trait that allows us to morph, even temporarily. So what you see at first glance might be very different from what you get a week or a month or a year later.

 

[Murray]

Turtle is so right about first impressions. Two of the most wonderful people that I have ever known seemed to be unpleasant people when I first met them. They both had these very "crusty" exteriors (if that makes any sense). After I got to know them though, I realized that they were the warmest, most genuine people I could ever hope to meet. They just are insecure and so are very reserved and sort of defensive when they meet new people.
I have a hard time being comfortable with people and so never really "understand" people, especially not right away. For me it takes time to get comfortable enough with someone to let them see who I am and I know that many people don't show me who they are right away (if at all). Personally I am terrible with reading people and eye contact, so don't have a clue most of the time. I have heard people say that eye contact is helpful, but I wouldn't know
Sorry, just rambling and not making sense,lol.

 

[Retired]

As has been said, there is no quick course on evaluating another person, however experience builds up a library of knowledge that might provide you with intuition.

Intuition is that gut feeling you get that tells you something is right or wrong....good or bad. It's not always accurate, but can usually be relied on as a guide.

I believe intuition comes with time and with experience, so there will be maistakes or errors in judgement made along the way but as your experience in life situations grows, I believe your intuition might also improve.

So to build up your intuitive library, you need to continue meeting new people, asking questions, listening and then drawing your conclusions. With time, this skill should be honed to where you might be able to make quicker evaluations.

 

[lotaloi]

As has been said, there is no quick course on evaluating another person, however experience builds up a library of knowledge that might provide you with intuition.

Intuition is that gut feeling you get that tells you something is right or wrong....good or bad. It's not always accurate, but can usually be relied on as a guide.

I believe intuition comes with time and with experience, so there will be maistakes or errors in judgement made along the way but as your experience in life situations grows, I believe your intuition might also improve.

So to build up your intuitive library, you need to continue meeting new people, asking questions, listening and then drawing your conclusions. With time, this skill should be honed to where you might be able to make quicker evaluations.

Yes,,,meeting more new people as many as possible could bring more intuition power. But ya there must be the crave to achieve so. Thanks.