I think I'm actually getting there...

[Banned]

"There" as in..."better".

I can't believe how different my life is now from six months ago. I'm able to get through the day without constant thoughts of suicide. I'm in school and enjoying it. I think I'm getting close to figuring out the right combo of meds.

I feel so much better. I don't wake up in complete despair before the day has even begun. I don't go to bed at night hoping I won't wake up the next day.

When I think back to six months ago, I was really, really resistant to alot of stuff, including meds. Now I'm seeing how different they can make me feel, and I'm ok with them. I want to feel good, hopeful, and happy all the time. Or most of the time anyway.

I don't know if I'll crash tomorrow or next week or next month or next year...but for now, I'm doing ok, and life is good.

I've turned a corner I never thought possible.

 

[Cat Dancer]

I'm glad things are better.

 

[Always Changing]

It is great that you are finally finding life is good,
Your post gives me hope that someday the right meds will be found for me.

Really happy for you. :hug:

 

[Murray]

That is wonderful! I can't tell you how happy I am for you Turtle.

 

[Banned]

AC,

I've been pretty lucky with meds...thankfully the ones I've tried have all been helping, and its been a matter of adjusting dosages for the most part.

You can and will get there. I never, ever thought I'd truly feel better. I thought I'd always be "faking it"...but I'm feeling so much better, on a much deeper level. It's been almost three weeks since my last crash, which isn't long for some people but for me it's close to a miracle, given I was crashing pretty much daily but pretty severely at least once a week.