Me again

[jeffrey]

Hello once again,
Last night i went into town for a few drinks with a friend,we were having a good time but things seemed to go wrong,wrong in so much as certain people i know and my ex knows have been very two faced and are spreading vicious and very damaging rumours about,now i may be slightly paranoid but people were looking at me in a disgusted manner,i tested myself by saying hello to a couple of them who both ignored me.These so called mutual friends that we have are being extremely destructive,they say hello to me,sit and talk with me or should i say pump me for information,act all nice then go away and tell my ex how i`m feeling or what i`m doing,so my ex finds out i`m doing well then tries to sabortage this in whatever way she can...these people are working for her like double agents,making me feel confused.

 

[jeffrey]

Hello once again,
Last night i went into town for a few drinks with a friend,we were having a good time but things seemed to go wrong,wrong in so much as certain people i know and my ex knows have been very two faced and are spreading vicious and very damaging rumours about,now i may be slightly paranoid but people were looking at me in a disgusted manner,i tested myself by saying hello to a couple of them who both ignored me.These so called mutual friends that we have are being extremely destructive,they say hello to me,sit and talk with me or should i say pump me for information,act all nice then go away and tell my ex how i`m feeling or what i`m doing,so my ex finds out i`m doing well then tries to sabortage this in whatever way she can...these people are working for her like double agents,making me feel confused.

 

[Lawz]

I have had this targetted at me too and it does seem to be inherent human nature. Sad they can't respect both you and your ex to let you get on with your lives and must be nosey and interferring!. Perhaps you could suggest that or say that's what you r doing to them in (using more polite words) : )

 

[Lawz]

I have had this targetted at me too and it does seem to be inherent human nature. Sad they can't respect both you and your ex to let you get on with your lives and must be nosey and interferring!. Perhaps you could suggest that or say that's what you r doing to them in (using more polite words) : )

 

[ThatLady]

Another sad life lesson is that some people love a drama, and will feed into one if given the opportunity. Another one is that misery really does love company. If these so-called "friends" are playing this little mind game, it just shows their own insecurities. Just keep your chin up, know what's true and what isn't, and work for your own best interests. If you find that certain people are working against your best interests, cut those people out of your mix of friends. They aren't friends. They're toxins.

 

[ThatLady]

Another sad life lesson is that some people love a drama, and will feed into one if given the opportunity. Another one is that misery really does love company. If these so-called "friends" are playing this little mind game, it just shows their own insecurities. Just keep your chin up, know what's true and what isn't, and work for your own best interests. If you find that certain people are working against your best interests, cut those people out of your mix of friends. They aren't friends. They're toxins.

 

[Lana]

Hi Jeffery;
I totally agree with ThatLady. In addition, you are not powerless in that situation. You know what these “friends” are doing, and you have all the power in the world to stop it. Keep your grace about you and say hello. If they ignore you, let them, knowing that you are being polite and courteous. And when they warm up to you just to draw information, simply tell with a smile “thank you for your concern but the matter is private and in the past. I wish [the ex] all the best as we both move forward with our lives.” If they persist, let them know that you have much respect for her and yourself to talk about things that are private to you both. You may find that two things will happen: they’re either going to walk away seeing that their hunger for misery is not going to be fed, or they will apologize and stop digging for dirt.

 

[Lana]

Hi Jeffery;
I totally agree with ThatLady. In addition, you are not powerless in that situation. You know what these “friends” are doing, and you have all the power in the world to stop it. Keep your grace about you and say hello. If they ignore you, let them, knowing that you are being polite and courteous. And when they warm up to you just to draw information, simply tell with a smile “thank you for your concern but the matter is private and in the past. I wish [the ex] all the best as we both move forward with our lives.” If they persist, let them know that you have much respect for her and yourself to talk about things that are private to you both. You may find that two things will happen: they’re either going to walk away seeing that their hunger for misery is not going to be fed, or they will apologize and stop digging for dirt.

 

[jeffrey]

Really good replies,thanks.
It really is quite strange to see this performance being played out in front of my eyes.I always knew this kind of thing goes on but never really took any notice until i found myself the centre of attention.I liked the referal of these people as toxins,very apt,pollutants of the human kind.I guess i have been rubbing shoulders with the wrong sorts of folk but i will not let this taint my view of people although it does make me wary,i guess this is all part of lifes lessons and i seem to be learning a lot,and especially on this web site. Thanks

 

[jeffrey]

Really good replies,thanks.
It really is quite strange to see this performance being played out in front of my eyes.I always knew this kind of thing goes on but never really took any notice until i found myself the centre of attention.I liked the referal of these people as toxins,very apt,pollutants of the human kind.I guess i have been rubbing shoulders with the wrong sorts of folk but i will not let this taint my view of people although it does make me wary,i guess this is all part of lifes lessons and i seem to be learning a lot,and especially on this web site. Thanks