More threads by lallieth

lallieth

Member
Ever since I started therapy,I am having more anxiety.Even though I am on medication,I can still feel the anxiety coursing through me,its only been 5 weeks since I started meds anyway.

One part of me is saying "back off" in regards to therapy,while the other is saying "plunge forward"

I have started thinking more on things that have happened in the past and to be honest,some of it really scares me to admit,but I realize that in order for me to move foward,I need to deal with these issues.

I know many of you have been where I am now and your thoughts are appreciated :)
 

David Baxter PhD

Late Founder
As I think you know, feeling increased anxiety at the beginning of therapy is not uncommon, for some of the reasons you mention.

It does get easier in time. :)
 

lallieth

Member
As I think you know, feeling increased anxiety at the beginning of therapy is not uncommon, for some of the reasons you mention.

It does get easier in time. :)
I fully understand that, and I have never backed down on anything because of anxiety and I don't plan to start now..so the anxiety can well...bite me :dimples:
 

Retired

Member
started thinking more on things that have happened in the past and to be honest,some of it really scares me to admit

Lallieth,

Ii have very limited experience in this regard, but I had a number of demons in my early life that became my deepest darkest secrets in adult life.

With the help of my physician and a supportive family I was able to talk about these demons and issues. That was twenty years ago.

The payoff for me was that the issues which became my deepest darkest secrets were no longer secrets and the issues that caused me concern were reduced in their importance.

I won't say the issues have disappeared, but they don't seem to dominate my thoughts and feelings in the way they did before the therapy.

In speaking with others who have undergone some types of therapy, the end result seems to reduce the issues and demons to a manageable size.

Would this be an acceptable end point in your case?
 

lallieth

Member
Hi Steve

Yes,I think that would be acceptable.Whether or not I release the demons in therapy or on paper,I think the fact that I am able to admit and be honest will take away their power.

I plan to start a journal and write down these thoughts that plague me.Being honest and open with myself is the first step.Being open with other people will be a giant leap,but it's a leap of faith I am willing to take.
 

Retired

Member
I wish you well in your journey, Lallieth. There are others here who can provide plenty of insights into what you can hope for and what you can expect.

Have you had that particular discussion with your therapist, namely what can you hope for and what can you expect?

Ask you therapist if the technique of letter writing is appropriate in your situation.

It helped me in the case of a person who had hurt me psychologically and physically when I was a child. The person was deceased, but I still harbored a great deal of resentment toward that person.

I wrote a very long letter describing in detail what this person had done and how it affected me, and I was finally able to tell this person, by way of the letter that would never be sent, all the things I had stored up all those years.

For me, this worked well to diminish the importance of the issue in my life o the point where I am very close to forgiveness. I say close, because I am not there yet.

I hope you find the peace you deserve, Lallieth

Steve
 

lallieth

Member
Hi Steve

My therapist knows what I hope for,and he knows I am willing to put in the work to achieve my goals...baby steps at first.

I am a determined person but I am also very realistic.

I hope you find the peace you deserve, Lallieth
Thank you Steve,,that is truly appreciated :)
 

Halo

Member
Lallieth, you mentioned that you are planning on starting a journal and I just wanted to let you know that I have found a great one that has really helped me a lot. I have not been really good with paper journals and I don't like the "unsecured" factor so I downloaded one from the internet onto my computer which is password protected and since it is downloaded on my computer, it is not seen by anyone.

Anyway, here is the link to the website if you are interested: IDailyDiary
 

lallieth

Member
Thanks Halo I will check that out

I noticed this morning,that my anxiety is becoming less and less,perhaps the celexa is starting to kick in,but I like to think it's because I am not giving it the attention it demands..I feel it,say to myself "ok so this is what it feels like" and refocus my attention to something else.
 
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