More threads by Thelostchild

Not only is my grandma leave, my parents moving to another state, but my counselor is leaving me also. Dang why am I so up set about it. he was a really good counselor and he helped me through so much, and now everybody is leaving me. I feel so empty. Is it normal so feel upset when you loose a therapist?
 

Halo

Member
TLC

I am really sorry to hear that you are losing your counsellor. I can relate completely and can tell you from experience that it is normal to feel upset, scared and even angry (or at least I was angry as I felt abandoned).

Did your counsellor advise when he was leaving and whether he is going to have a replacement take over or whether he is going to refer you to someone else?

My thoughts and prayers are with you at this tough time
Take care
:hug:
 

ThatLady

Member
It's very normal to feel upset when you lose a therapist. This is something you need to talk to him about. Ask him who he might recommend you see in his stead. :hug:
 
He did give me notice as to when our last day would be, and there is someone in the same office whom he told me about. Ok, I thought It was abnormal for someone who is going to a counselor for 4 years, and then loss them and cry about it. but, really 4 years is a long time this person knows you and you know them and developing trust is important. I don't know if I could talk him about this because, I will just break down again and cry about it.
 

Halo

Member
TLC

I think talking about it with him is a good thing. I also think that he would completely understand and if you breakdown and cry that is okay as well. You have built a professional trusting relationship with a person that you have been seeing for 4 years and to have that person leaving is a huge transition in your life that is a loss just like any other.

Please trust me on this one TLC, talk to him about how you are feeling because if you don't and you let this opportunity slide by then you may never get the chance to again. I know in my case, I never got that chance to say what I wanted and it has been hard to deal with.

Take care
:hug: :hug:
 
tlc i think halo's right. 4 years is a long time. your therapist has become an important person to you because he's been there to listen and guide you for 4 years. i think it's quite normal and to be expected.
 
im sorry to hear your therapist is leaving, ive never had one long enough to get reallly attached, but my GP has been with me for 11 years now and if he ever left I know I would be gutted, so I can understand how your feeling, i agree with Halo tell him how your feeling :hug:
 

Halo

Member
I had my therapist leave without warning after seeing her for 8 years and that was like ripping my heart out. That is what I mean TLC by saying that I never got a chance to say what I really wanted to her before she left.

She definitely was not my first therapist that has left without warning and now I am always fearful that whatever therapist I see will leave also. It really is a scary, sad feeling to have. :(
 
I had my therapist leave without warning after seeing her for 8 years and that was like ripping my heart out. That is what I mean TLC by saying that I never got a chance to say what I really wanted to her before she left.

She definitely was not my first therapist that has left without warning and now I am always fearful that whatever therapist I see will leave also. It really is a scary, sad feeling to have. :(

Halo, I am so sorry that more than one therapist has left you without warning. I am more sorry that you have to live with the fear that any therapist from now on will leave, too. I am afraid myself that my therapist will leave me suddenly, even though she hasn't showed me something like that.We even discussed it and she reassured me that even if a problem showed up we would discuss it thoroughly before any decisions were made.
I guess your post touched me so muh because I have this fear inside me.
 
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sunset

Member
I think we all know exactly how you are feeling. Quite normal I think, especially when you have a few people leaving at the same time. I also think you should ask for a referral, and in no time you may like the new therapist just as much.
 

Halo

Member
Persephone,

I too am sorry that you have that fear inside you and yes it seems like the fear doesn't go away however I can tell you that it does lessened over time. Since I posted this originally in late 2006 the hurt and anger that I felt towards my therapist of 8 years is still there but it is more manageable and understandable now that I am further removed from the day she left. I know that she needed to do what was right for her at that time and I can relate to that. I am not saying that it was and still is difficult on some days though. 8 years was a long time however I also see that I was not making the progress that I should have been and her leaving was actually a blessing in disguise.

I can tell you that I have experienced my current therapist leaving temporarily but for much different reasons and due to no fault of anyones. Although I have been in contact with my regular therapist on a regular basis, I have also been very lucky to find a replacement during the absence but I keep having to remind myself that it is just a brief absence. I have also been reassured many times that my regular therapist will be returning. Sometimes I need lots of reassurance because of my previous history with therapists leaving but that is okay as long as I am comfortable and acknowledge that it is only temporary.

I am glad that both you and your therapist have talked about this and she is aware of your fears. That is really great :)
 

ladylore

Account Closed
And here I thought I was the only one with this fear of therapy suddenly ending. I had the same experience too, many years ago. That pain has lessened but now I am continually questioning my therpist's motives (ending therapy - suddenly being discharged).

It isn't a great feeling but it helps to know I am not alone.
 
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