Natural sleep seems unnatural to me

[BluMac81]

On some occassions I have tried to sleep without any medications, on nights when I am extremely tired... but find that the more tired I am, the more anxious I get, and the more anxious I get, the less likely I am to sleep.

A doctor called it psycho-physiological insomnia (mind-body), and that is why I am perscribed sleep aids AND benzos in order to sleep. I don't know where this came from but it started in 2003, five years ago, and has gotten worse since.

One thing is that my mind races about things I did that day, things I need to do tomorrow, and then dwells on the fact that I NEED to get to sleep for tomorrow's tasks and get anxious about the fact that I won't sleep! It's a ridiculous cycle but it has been plaguing me for years.

Heck, tonight, its 11:38pm, I arrived home after a grueling 8 hour drive exhausted at 6pm, took my meds at 9pm, and then suddenly felt the need to do this and that and the other thing....11pm rolls around and I figure I should get to bed, but anxiety increases as I even start walking towards the bed.

It was this night that I chose not to take the usual xanax since I'm trying to wene off of it (dangerous drug I find), but resorted to (just a few moments ago) taking another 2mg lunesta and 3mg xanax.

I just don't know HOW to sleep, as crazy as that sounds. Just lie there? Do nothing? What are you supposed to think about? Do you force some dream-thinking? Sleep just totally feels unnatural to me...

 

[Halo]

Blu,

I just wanted to comment on this part of your post:

It was this night that I chose not to take the usual xanax since I'm trying to wene off of it (dangerous drug I find), but resorted to (just a few moments ago) taking another 2mg lunesta and 3mg xanax.

While I understand that Xanax may not be the right drug for you, making the statement that it is a dangerous one is incorrect. It is a drug that has helped many, many people in the past and will continue to do so well into the future. Again, it may not be the right one for you but for others it works and should not be called dangerous at least in my opinion.

 

[Daniel E.]

Are you still seeing a therapist concerning your anxiety? And from a new blog post concerning insomnia:

Cognitive techniques help people identify, challenge and replace negative, inaccurate sleep thoughts with accurate, positive sleep thoughts. Negative sleep thoughts can occur during the night ("I won't be able to function tomorrow if I don't get to sleep soon") as well as during the day ("I got an awful night of sleep last night so I will have a terrible day at work today"). Positive sleep thoughts are used to counteract the negative thoughts with more accurate information ("I am not sleeping well tonight but I have had many other nights like this and have been able to function reasonably well at work anyway"). Cognitive techniques help reduce stress and allow better sleep.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy of Insomnia | Psychology Today Blogs