More threads by visioconf2005

hi everybody,

i'm new here. i'm currently under therapy (CBT) to resolve some issues i'have been having since the birth of my son (who is 20 months old).

with my husband and son, we live in the uk (arrived last year) after moving out of the US after 2 wonderful years . my husband got a job in europe. we are european but love the US a lot and consider one day to go back home!

we moved a lot last year to finally move in here (london), place i didn't want to go because i feel like i'm a stranger in europe now. everything turned out to be worse and worse when my husband and i had a crisis last march (he used the chat rooms to get somebody to listen to him as i couldn't stand him anymore aat that time), i was very aggressive and depressed. he was ****ed off because i was complaining all the time about everything here.

i got involved my mom and MIL as the situation could't be solved together. he refused to see a counsellor. months later, when my MIL came to visit us, i exploded (because i had in mind a lot about my MIL) and she started to create a big drama about me, how selfish i was, that i was very aggressive towards her...bla bla bla. see the thread that i have written in anger / conflict.

now i have to be in control when she's around. i'm still weak (she doesn't know i'm seeing a therapist) and i'm sure she will try to provoke me again. my CBT changed me and now my life is back on track with my husband and son but i feel scared to welcome her simply because she will play with my emotions again , try to put me down. that's why i'm here to get some advice to deal with her in a gentle way to let her know that she won't play with me anymore.

thanks for reading
welcome visio. i don't have a quick and easy solution to your mother in law situation, is this something maybe you could discuss with your therapist?

how long is she coming for and is she staying with you? if she is staying with you that will put a lot more pressure on the situation. if at all possible, you might want to try to have her stay elsewhere and let her visit in the day time.
hi ladybug,
i talked about with my therapist but i needed some advice from others.
if our friends come for new year's eve, she will stay at the hotel otherwise she'll come home.
and i will be with her the entire day (dec 31st) because my husband will work!
terrible for me!! i'm scared
can you invite friends over while she is with you during the day? that way at least there is a distraction in place and it's not just you and her. is there some activity you can go do outside the home so you're not cooped up? something to keep you guys occupied?
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