Nothing fits anymore

[Thelostchild]

Im wondering if Im just late growing into my women body? Is that possible. I know that im not obese and im not emaceded either. One this i noticed is that I ware bigger pants and a bigger shirt and thats not because i have a big yucky stomach. its because...well use your imagination. yeah I thought that was supposed to be a great thing but as it has turned out it stinks. None of my clothes fit and its getting really annoying. Just this moring I got rid of 7 pairs of pants. :frown:

 

[Diana]

How old are you Em?

 

[Thelostchild]

I'm 24

 

[Diana]

Well, were you somewhat underweight before? If so, your body might be just trying to develop into what it's supposed to be. Listen, I have had problems with that area of my body ever since puberty. And imagine this. I live in Asia! I see so many cute shirts at good prices and I bring them home and I find them too tight. I know how it feels. But, you know what. I've been eating three meals a day again and exercising and just trying to do the best with my body that I can. Not only for my outside appearance, but for strength and energy. If your clothes are getting tighter you might be gaining needed weight. That's ok. For example, often when I go through stages where I exercise a lot I usually gain weight too. But, I don't look bigger. I just put on muscle. At one point in my life I lost a lot of weight and needed to get it back. It was really hard. My mind kept flip flopping from wanting to gain weight to not wanting to gain weight. Then, clothes don't fit you anymore and you feel like panicking. I know. Just hang in there. Have you been diagnosed with an eating disorder, or do you suspect you might have one? Or, is it just simply the fact that you've been gaining some weight recently?

 

[Diana]

By the way, I probably have seven paris of pants at home that don't fit me anymore either. I need to do a major clean-up

 

[Thelostchild]

Yes i was always under weight <edit by mod: please don't post specific numbers in regards to weight or height>.? But when i put on more normal health weight my.. yeah they grew too. Its frustrating. I find that im more self concence about myself. I find sweaters and bigger shirts to cover up the bigger me, but then again that fits my around my bust.. No I was never was Diagnose with an eating disorder.? But me and my counselor are working through it slowly but surely. Im also keeping a journal of what I eat and how much.

 

[Eunoia]

did your counselor tell you to keep a journal of what you're eating or is that something you do to try and keep track of what and how much you're eating?? just focusing on your food intake may increase your awareness of which types of nutrients you're lacking or having a lot of, but I find in people w/ eating problems they can also get you to obessess even more, which is potentially very unhealthy. What you could try to do is write down what you eat and what you're thinking/feeling around that time and what you're doing to cope, this way you're not focusing on the food, but it's really good insight into why you might be eating, restricting, craving certain foods and what's really going on inside of you. it takes some work to get to a point where you can connect your thoughts & emotions to food but it can be very insightful...

 

[Thelostchild]

No I just started doing this on my own.

 

[Diana]

Yes, I think Eunoia has a really good point. With people without eating disorders (or at least anorexia or bulimia) who need to lose weight, recording your food intake can be a very helpful tool. But, people who have/have had anorexia, bulimia or something in between, recording food can become dangerous. You might start out with the right intentions. Maybe you just want to stay at a healthy weight, build muscle, etc. But all it might take is one bad day when you start feeling horribly about yourself and you can use your records to reduce your calories. I know all about it. With me, at this stage I'm finding keeping track of my food very useful. It's helping me to eat enough. But, I have to keep myself in line. However, the thing about me is that I've suffered through anorexia before, my boyfriend knows I have, my parents, family and close friends know I have, and usually when I start feeling awful about myself I end up being vocal about it to my boyfriend. Not that he can stop me from what I'm doing, but I find that getting vocal about it does something that snaps me back into place eventually.
I've never tried keeping a journal of emotions when eating, but that sounds like a good idea for you ThelostChild. At least better than just obsessing over what it is you're eating/not eating/how much, etc. Also, maybe you should tell your therapist about your journal and see if she any any suggestions.
Just one more thing. When girls lose weight their breasts usually get smaller. When they gain weight, they get bigger. I know how it feels, but it's really a very natural thing. It doesn't look fat or freakish. It makes you look like a woman. I'm slowly coming to accept that I have to order my bras online because no stores carry my size. Not even in Canada. And I'm a fairly small person. That's just my proportions. So, you don't have to feel bad or be paranoid about it. Yes, I know - easier said than done Just keep discussing it with your therapist.

 

[Eunoia]

writing down food records w/ the emotions/thoughts & coping used is actually something my therapist uses, but it can get overwhelming at times, and I think what really helps you make sense of them is discussing each day w/ your therapist... so if you're already keeping track of what you're eating you could incorporate it into therapy so you might want to pass it by him/her and see where that takes you... there really IS a difference btwn doing this to obsess about it or doing it as part of a diet/exercise/lifestyle change or as part of therapy... something to think about.