• Quote of the Day
    "You are much deeper, much broader, much brighter than any idea you could have of yourself."
    Harry Palmer, posted by Daniel

ladylore

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I have lived with panic attacks for many years so I am quite use to them, even though the type has changed since my addictions have been treated. I have an ongoing issue with my counsellor which was suppose to be taken care of 5 weeks ago and wasn't. The situation triggered other past events and I have had increased panic attacks and possibly an obsessive episode.

This morning was different. I woke up with the attack in full swing - I was sweating, feeling nausiated, almost physically getting sick. When I feel panic I usually get angry these days. This morning it was just "Stop The Panic" which created more. I am getting tired of these things. Especially waking up with one.

I ended up writing a letter and sending to the clinical supervisor who was really the one to look after this particular situation. It mainly has to do with not knowing how how long the counselling will continue. They have an a slow curtail of appointments over a year - first 12 weeks, once a week, then it goes down to every 2 weeks and every 3. But I found out about this by accident and because of memory problems I only remembered exactly what was said to me at the beginning and what was not. The appointment sheme was not mentioned.

So now I am bracing myself just incase I am told I've lost my counsellor. I don't see it happening but I am always prepared for the worst.

Tonight I feel anxious and trying to keep it at bay. I don't want to go through the terror I went through this morning. Thats what it felt like - the world was going to end right then and there if I didn't do something.

Thanks for listening

Ladylore
 

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