ThatLady
Member
Today, we had to euthanize our long asthmatic, 12-year-old Himalayan cat. It was a difficult and humbling experience.
I've lost family members, my grandfather only a few years ago. It was I who guided the other family through the loss, and I who held up to hold up others. I cried my tears privately, and tried to remember the good times. My grandfather was severely demented at his death, so it was a blessing in many ways. His intellect had always been his pride, and that had been taken from him.
Somehow, I found the necessity of euthanizing this cat more difficult that any death I've dealt with to date. Perhaps, it's because I've put so much of myself into trying to make his life as comfortable as I could, considering his very severe asthma. Perhaps, it's because you can't explain to a cat why things are the way they are. Yet, I knew this last attack was the harbinger of his last "good day". I said my goodbyes, and my father was kind enough to take him to the veterinarian for me. I wasn't emotionally able to face the ordeal. Although my work is dealing with death and dying, I couldn't hold myself together for this one.
I know he's now beyond his suffering, and I shall be beyond mine once the grieving process is complete. He was a family member. He'll be remembered for all the love he gave, and all the fun he had and shared with us, his human family. It's the good things that make the love so worth having shared.
I hope this helps those of you who have lost loved ones, human or otherwise. I felt that, perhaps, knowing that even those of us who deal with death as a part of our vocation still must deal with the difficulties that follow loss.
I've lost family members, my grandfather only a few years ago. It was I who guided the other family through the loss, and I who held up to hold up others. I cried my tears privately, and tried to remember the good times. My grandfather was severely demented at his death, so it was a blessing in many ways. His intellect had always been his pride, and that had been taken from him.
Somehow, I found the necessity of euthanizing this cat more difficult that any death I've dealt with to date. Perhaps, it's because I've put so much of myself into trying to make his life as comfortable as I could, considering his very severe asthma. Perhaps, it's because you can't explain to a cat why things are the way they are. Yet, I knew this last attack was the harbinger of his last "good day". I said my goodbyes, and my father was kind enough to take him to the veterinarian for me. I wasn't emotionally able to face the ordeal. Although my work is dealing with death and dying, I couldn't hold myself together for this one.
I know he's now beyond his suffering, and I shall be beyond mine once the grieving process is complete. He was a family member. He'll be remembered for all the love he gave, and all the fun he had and shared with us, his human family. It's the good things that make the love so worth having shared.
I hope this helps those of you who have lost loved ones, human or otherwise. I felt that, perhaps, knowing that even those of us who deal with death as a part of our vocation still must deal with the difficulties that follow loss.
