Unproductive therapy sessions

[boi]

I went to my therapy session and I feel bad about it. I think I went on and on and I wasn't that productive and I got a little aggressive. I feel bad about myself and guilty for being a little aggressive. I think I was, maybe it was my perception. I feel like I need to go deeper in therapy and I just cant. I tried to open up certain discussions but they automatically became superficial because of me not my T. I need to tell my T next time that I need to go deeper. I feel sad and annoyed that I wont let myself go there. There, being anything that I find uncomfortable talking about. Why do I feel so bad about myself. I guess it's normal to have unproductive sessions right?

 

[Andy]

I have had many unproductive sessions myself because of the way I was feeling on that particular day. I think it's normal. I think that's a good idea to let your T know that you need to be pushed a little bit. Getting into a comfort zone isn't good IMO because then you don't get to the hard stuff and it just becomes monotonous. Don't feel to bad I'm pretty sure it's a normal thing. The fact that you notice it is good because now you can do something about it, right? :2thumbs:

 

[boi]

thanks STP. I think I'm obsessing because I just in there and vented and never came out with a solution. Now I have to wait another week to apologize. I will try and calm down and not obsess about it. I feel like I did something wrong. I'm in trouble and I have to make it right.
silly but true

 

[Andy]

Is it necessary for you to come out with a solution every time you go? Sometimes the solution comes with a little more time thinking about it, maybe that's why you didn't get your solution, you weren't there yet. Do you always feel you have to figure things out within one session? I would hate for you to try and rush through things if you actually need more time on them.

Do you mean apologize for not figuring things out in time or for something else you did? If it's the former you certainly don't need to apologize.

I don't think it's silly to obsess about things, of course if it gets to much then that may be something else you could work on.

Sorry if I misunderstood anything.

 

[boi]

STP,
you are right. I am trying to rush through things. I was looking for a solution in 45 minutes and I felt like it was very superficial. You are right, your comment made me think, thanks. I need more time on things. I want to apologize to my T not for, not figuring things out but for being so emotionally charged. I was a little aggressive, with what I was talking about. I wasn't aggressive towards my T but I am worried she might feel that way. I know logically she most probably did not take offense to it but my anxiety is high because of my outburst and it's going round and round in my head and their is no solution right now. I said something concrete (kinda black and white thinking) and she just said ok. I felt she gave up a little because of my attitude. I'm kind of worried. So, the best thing to do is probably just accept that I am allowed to get over emotional (aggression) in therapy???maybe.....not be so hard on myself. maybe

 

[Andy]

Oh my, I can only imagine some of the things a T has seen or gone through with clients. But I do imagine anger(aggression) is right up there for emotions. If you want to apologize it can't hurt and then that would definitely bring the subject up again so you two can talk about it.

If it makes you feel any better, if she felt you were aggressive toward her and she was worried about it, she would probably discuss it with you next week (this week?) so it's not like you will leave her feeling offended if she even is.
I know that doesn't stop the thoughts going round and round now though, sorry. I am really not the person to be suggesting ways to stop your mind from going round and round.

Of course your allowed to get over emotional in therapy. It's all part of the process I would think.
Well I mean, not violently or threatening harm on your T of course, which I am not saying your doing lol just putting that out there for whoever.

I think that you might be being a little hard on yourself. Your appointment is there for next week (this week?) and it's not going anywhere, maybe you could just try to remind yourself of that and that there is no need to stress about it now. Do you have an email address for her so you could talk about it briefly and at least get some worries out there? If not, would it help to just write it down for yourself, to try to get some of that anxiety out?
Those are some suggestions, maybe a little lame, I don't know.

 

[boi]

thanks STP. You are right, I have an appointment next week and I can let it all out then. My apologies etc.....Thanks for your suggestions they do make me feel better about myself..