What are you supposed to do....

[Into The Light]

it's good to hear from you again. i too am glad you are feeling a little better.

 

[Halo]

I too am glad that you are starting to feel a little better and also that you are going to hang out with us on here more...great to have you back

 

[Retired]

Good for you Rosa! Glad to hear you are feeling better.

Please keep us posted on how it goes.

 

[Rosa]

I'm doing a bit better today. I guess the meds are starting to work. The Abilify can make me tired but it does slow my thoughts down and that has helped. I just don't understand what causes those suicidal thoughts...obsessions if you will..... why I get so overwhelmed with thoughts of killing myself. Friends this is so scarey, when you can't even trust yourself to keep yourself safe-what then? I know, there are places (such as hospitals) to go to, but that in itself doesn't change anything. It might give you the time you need to get over the thoughts this time, but in all likelyhood if faced with this I would likely lie to everyone involved just to get myself out of there-then I'd even be in a worse place (more medical bills). For the most part I am completely (or mostly) normal, but then there are these times if people knew what I was thinking they would be blown away. Oh well, glad to be back and sending hugs to everyone!!
Rosa

 

[ladylore]

I am glad you are doing better.

I lived with suidical thoughts for many years. Even though I was rarely ready to act on those thoughts they did provide me with a choice. If the pain got too bad I could have a way out.

Those thoughts haven't occured to me in over a year. I have a whole list of other options besides suicide as it isn't an option anymore. I am glad things have changed and I thank my lucky stars that I have kept going as things have changed.

Glad you have chosen to keep going too. Just keep talking.

:hug:

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I'm glad you're back, too, Rosa.

 

[Holly]

Hi Rosa,
Glad to read your feeling a bit better, take care.

 

[Cat Dancer]

Glad you're feeling a little better.

I can relate to being terrified of having those scary thoughts and feelings about suicide. I have been struggling with this too and it's so scary.

Take care of yourself. You deserve good things.

 

[Rosa]

It is very scary, my biggest fear is that some day it will just be too much and I'm going to act on it-it can be pretty hard when you can't even trust yourself at times.

Thankfully, though, I am feeling better. I'm thinking as long as I have those dogs theres no way I'm going to kill myself. They are the closest thing I've ever had to family and I don't want to do anything to take that away.

Rosa

 

[Retired]

It is very scary, my biggest fear is that some day it will just be too much and I'm going to act on it

Rosa,

You must not get ahead of yourself, and become fearful of what might happen. We cannot make a plan for what might happen, because we don't have enough facts about future, potential situations.

Lets face it, if we had to have a plan in place for every potential future happening, it would be overwhelming at best and largely impossible.

We can only deal with what is occurring in our lives at the moment.

And because your mood and state of mind are in balance these days, as you report you do not feel at risk.

With the help of the health professional with whom you consult and the support of your friends and family, you can hope to remain in your current state.

If that state happens to change, and you feel at risk, make use of the resources available to you, your doctor, therapist, friends and family to help get you back to the state you now enjoy.

Deal with situations as they occur, and try not to speculate on what might be in the future.

 

[lallieth]

Hi Rosa

Your dogs are lovely and I am glad you are feeling better.I agree with Steve,in that,you must not allow yourself to get caught in "projection" thinking.We can't predict what will happen in the future

Do you know how your dogs live Rosa? have you given it any thought.
Dogs live in the NOW..in the moment.
They have no care for the past or the future,but what happens to them each single moment.
They live each moment like their last,happy & content just to "be"

They have no idea when the next walk or treat will come,but boy,watch them when it does come..their bodies go into full excited wiggle mode,and their faces light up with pure joy

Watch your dogs for a few moments each day,watch them sleep in pure contentment,chasing elusive rabbits in their dreams,watch them play and interact,bouncing,play growling,full of joy and life...

We should all live our lives like dogs..living for the moment IN the moment,must be pure bliss.

 

[ladylore]

Lets hear it for the dogs! :thewave:

 

[Rosa]

Lets hear it for the dogs! :thewave:

Your too cute!!!! Thanks. There is a problem that has arisen. The Abilify I think is causing my blood sugar levels to skyrocket. Since I've been back on it (I didn't really check my levels when I was on it before...I know, bad me) but but since going back on it every morning my sugar levels are out of control. This morning I got my highest reading ever of 148 and thats fasting. I'm really not sure what to do. I know I will have to disclose this to my doctor which will also mean disclosing the fact that I didn't check it before....gee...I just can't win here.
Rosa
but your all right about my dogs....as you can see in their pic, they are a wonderful family to me!!!

 

[ladylore]

I personally have no knowledge with the medication Abilify so telling your doctor would be a good thing and yes probably not checking your blood too. I don't think your the first person who hasn't checked their blood sugar levels on a regular basis. Your doctor has probably heard it before. But I would definitely make an appointment as soon as you can to make sure everything is alright.

 

[Halo]

I agree with Ladylore...making an appointment with your doctor sooner rather than later would be best especially if the medication is causing your blood sugar levels to go up that significantly. Its true Rosa...I am sure that the doctor has heard it all before but the a positive thing about this is that he will see that you are checking it this time and really trying to take care of yourself now

Good luck and let us know how it goes :hug:

 

[lallieth]

Your too cute!!!! Thanks. There is a problem that has arisen. The Abilify I think is causing my blood sugar levels to skyrocket. Since I've been back on it (I didn't really check my levels when I was on it before...I know, bad me) but but since going back on it every morning my sugar levels are out of control. This morning I got my highest reading ever of 148 and thats fasting. I'm really not sure what to do. I know I will have to disclose this to my doctor which will also mean disclosing the fact that I didn't check it before....gee...I just can't win here.
Rosa
but your all right about my dogs....as you can see in their pic, they are a wonderful family to me!!!

I read that the medication you are on can increase blood sugar levels as a side effect,and I would report that to your dr.

 

[Retired]

From the Abilify Web Site:

Serious side effects can occur with any antipsychotic medicine, including ABILIFY. Tell your healthcare professional right away if you have any conditions or side effects, including the following:

• Very high fever, rigid muscles, shaking, confusion, sweating, or increased heart rate and blood pressure. These may be signs of a condition called neuroleptic malignant syndrome (NMS), a rare but serious side effect which could be fatal
• Abnormal or uncontrollable movements. These may be signs of a serious condition called tardive dyskinesia (TD), which may be permanent
  
• Elderly: An increased risk of stroke and ministroke has been reported in a clinical study of elderly patients with dementia-related psychosis
  
• Diabetes, risk factors for diabetes (for example, obesity, family history of diabetes), or unexpected increases in thirst, urination, or hunger. Increases in blood sugar levels (hyperglycemia), in some cases serious and associated with coma or death, have been reported in patients taking medicines like ABILIFY. Ask your healthcare professional about the need to monitor your blood sugar level before and during treatment

The increase in blood sugar with Abilify should be reported to your doctor immediately. Your doctor would expect to hear about such a side effect because of its seriousness, Rosa.