A book... oufff...

[Ashley-Kate]

I recently started therapy with a psychologist. I really trust him and i feel comfortable with him. What bothers me at the moment is that he recently encouraged me to read a book on PTSD due to the abuse i lived in my past. He feels it could be very helpful also because i am dealing with symptoms of PTSD for a very long time. I started reading the book and i can't seem to finish it. The terms trauma, abuse, victim, rape, are terms that i find very hard to deal with or accept. I am still in this phase that using the terms EVENT or situation are easier to describe what happened and I don't understand the importance in using such harsh terms such as abuse or even trauma.

I find reading this book really hard because those words seem to be the only ones used.

 

[H011yHawkJ311yBean]

Re: a book oufff...

Hm... Have you told him about this? Maybe his intent was to try to gently introduce you into using other terms that are more specific and less general.

Only other thing I can possibly think of is, with his permission if it is a borrowed book, you could ask if you could cross out the specific terms with a pencil and write "Event" or another generalized term. I take it you can't mentally cross it out and replace it with a different term... It's too harsh? Unfortunately most books will use more specific wording. Editors actually hate repeating the same words when they can use a good thesaurus... lol

 

[Yuray]

Re: a book oufff...

Stop reading the book if it doesn't offer any insights. There are other ways to deal with your ptsd.

 

[David Baxter PhD]

I don't think it's that it doesn't add any insights. I think it's more that she's having a problem with specific terms.

Ashley, I would suggest that learning to hear those words, say those words, and apply those words to what happened to you is an important part of your therapy. Calling what happened "an event" or even "the event" is a way of distanbcing yourself from the trauma, but one problem with that it it probably also makes it easier for you to take on some of the respoinsibility for what happened. Calling it what it is, i.e., abuse, rape, sexual assault, etc., may help you to separate yourself as the victim from the actions of the perpetrator. And quite possibly you have found a good therapist who understand that this is necessary for you to move forward.

I would urge you to talk to your therapist about the difficulty you have with those words. I think you need to do this. In the meantime, if you're finding reading the book difficult, leave it until your next appointment and talk to your therapist about it.

 

[Ashley-Kate]

i reached a very interesting chapiter today it talks about exposure. funny how my exposing myself to these terms is difficult and in the very book there is a full chapiter on accepting these terms and what happened with less anxiety. I see my therapist on the 18th of july he is on vacation till then, I do undertand that his goal in asking me to read the book was to understand what the therapist and dr. have been trying to make me see and also for me to understand that i can't hide from that definition of the events. It hard to read this when i know his perception is almost the same as the books yet it makes me feel vulnerable and scared that he perceaves me as a victim someone that is weak and someone that didn't have control. when i spent the last 12 years of my life presenting myself as a person with control

 

[forgetmenot]

Ashley he does not see you as a victim he sees you as a fighter one that ones to adresse what happened and to heal You are taking control back now by doing the things asked of you to get well Way to go hugs

 

[Ashley-Kate]

I just finished the book a couple of days ago and i reread it again just to highlight the parts that seemed interesting and more relevant to me.
it's really a good book i must admit. thanks spirit
the book caused me to fel a lot more and be in touch with my past a lot more so i decided to call a therapist at the criis center i went to in the past when i was not in therapie and the psychologist i had their will see me until my psychologist comes back simply to give me some time with someone every week to talk
i have an appoinment tomorrow I called today it was quick. my psychologist comes back in 2 weeks and a half