Can't Handle This Anymore

[Eye Stigmata]

I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown.

I'm torn between two things that I love so much, and I can't seem to pick a side...

How do you part from something that you love so much? Without destroying the friendship? I can't do this.....and I can't handle the pain and stress that comes with it.....why can't I have both!

I know at the end of the day I need to do what is best for me...but this is breaking my heart. I'm losing sleep over it....I just....I can't seem to make anyone happy, either way I end up hurting one side and....I don't want to hurt either.

I can just see myself falling apart over this, I should be happy and proud of myself for moving foward, but instead I'm punishing and kicking myself for upseting other people. What happened to living for yourself?

......Ahh.....I don't know what to do......tick tock tick tock.....Maybe If I just unexpectedly passed away......this would be easier for everyone

 

[Daniel E.]

I know at the end of the day I need to do what is best for me...

Well, there you go.

...but this is breaking my heart.

Generally speaking, I would rather feel guilt than resentment as the guilt tends to go away rather quickly.

 

[Charity]

I'm so sorry to hear that you're feeling this way! I know how much it can hurt.
You seem to know what the best choice for you would be in this situation; you're just worried about how it affects those around you, is that right? That can be very trying, but I agree with you that you do need to do what's best for you. Everyone has their own set of problems-- can you be expected to solve everyone's? As vulnerable as you're feeling right now, I think it's enough of a challenge to cope with your own. As long as you're not going out of your way, actively TRYING to hurt someone, you're doing the right thing by trying to make your life better. You're just as worthy of happiness as anyone else, so please don't feel that you need to suffer any more for their sakes.
Take care of you!

 

[Jazzey]

I agree with the everything everyone's said. I just wanted to give you :support:

 

[forgetmenot]

im sorry your feeling upset Eye Stigmata but your right you have to do what is best for you and the others around you must understand that please take care mary

 

[HBas]

Eye Stigmata,

There is never an easy balance between keeping ourselves and others happy ... Everyone tells me "if the people around you respect you they will want what's best for you" ... Not always the situation and every situation is unique - our needs differ and sometimes clash. You must remember that YOU must always look after YOURSELF first cause when you allow other people or situations to dictate your actions you will become miserable and will not be able to help anyone else or Yourself.

The fact that you care and don't want to make life uncomfortable for anyone else shows that you have an awesome heart. Doing what you feel is best for you means that you care enough for everyone around you to want to give only THE BEST OF YOU.

You are very brave - please take it easy on yourself.