Emotionally unstable

[Thelostchild]

Holy moley, I've been so depressed for the last four days that I stayed in bed and didn't eat anything. I've lost weight. My grandpa who has cancer got lower lobe pneumonia and it got septic which is

The systemic inflammatory response to infection Sepsis associated with organ dysfunction, hypo perfusion, or hypotension.

And that same night my husband wanted to have sex and I said no I’m too depressed over everything. And then the other morning he flew out of bed mad because I wouldn’t snuggle with him and that causes him insecurities. F**** I'm so at my wits end that I just can't deal with it anymore. I did SI twice which I do regret. And now Im having to take my Klonopin PRN .5 mg just to keep it together, I think they are going to have to up the dose on my lamictal from 100 to 150 or something just until things get stable out again.

I'm also having a he** of a time living here. I can’t say that I love it. I'm here because of his job. Jeezzz I'm so stressed. I’ve had an emotional break down just about everyday. Things seem to be getting out of control.

I needed this rant and I don’t get to see my psych until next Monday..

 

[Jazzey]

I'm sorry to hear about your Grandpa TLC. Is there any way that you could move up the appointment with your psych? In the meantime, I hope you'll keep yourself safe.

Have you tried any of the exercises on this forum for how to deal with SI urges when you're having them?

Please force yourself to keep eating. I tend to do the same thing, i stop eating and I inevitably dip deeper in my depression. Food is really important to keep our brain sharp and also helps with the energy levels. When i don't eat, I can spend days in bed...It's really important to keep it up TLC.

 

[Thelostchild]

There's a lot of times I just think about it, but I don't do it. I do a lot of things when the weather is nice like ride my horses practice barrel racing and reining, walking our dog and the new puppy. I'm currently unemployed so I stay at home and clean and myspace a lot, do alot of potty patrol with this young one.

 

[Jazzey]

I'm happy to hear that TLC. And that young puppy sounds like a lot of work. But I'm sure it's "cute" work at this point.

 

[Thelostchild]

Well she is more then a handful. I have to keep the house clean so she doesn't get into things like cat boxes, my clothes, terrorizing the other dog and cats, and potting on the floor. OMG I'm trying so hard to potty train but its getting difficult and frustrating.