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:support:We definitely do care. It's crappy that your going through this. We are here for you.
My heart is with you Turtle, Daniel is right about selective thinking, but knowing that is not very helpful to you right now.
At times seemingly tiny events can lighten my dark days and hope seems possible.

I wish I knew what little ray of hope would help you at the moment :hug:

Daniel E.
Granted, cognitive techniques are not very exciting, but, OTOH:

Suicidal thought processes are viewed here as causal (as opposed to merely correlated) factors in suicidality. Cognition and Suicide: Theory, Research, and Therapy (9781591473572): Thomas E. Ellis: Books
And CBT includes behavior therapy, including doing the opposite of how you feel in order to help change your mood:

The best way to think about it is that emotions love themselves. They just keep themselves going. That's why it's so difficult to change. Because they go round and round and round.

One of the ways that you can change your emotion is to just reverse the circle. We just start with action that is opposite and that circle starts going in the other way. And the emotion starts going down. Kind of like a miracle.

Opposite Action - Part 1
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