Hi everybody,
I have been feeling very down for about 3 months now... its really bad. Probably worst its ever been in my life.
For those of you who have not read my other posts:
I moved from Canada to Australia about 5 years ago to marry my wife (who lived here in Aus.)
I HAD a good paying job when I first got here... but my depression and physical illness has presented problems over last 2 years.
I went back to school to get my newest qualifications so I can go back into teaching (I teach I.T.: Computer Networking, hardware and security)... but its expensive and we are living off my wifes 'average' income.
My health has been getting worse and worse over time... related to my weight mostly I think... I am a very heavy person. I hate decided to have lapband surgery to help but its tough being on the pre-surgery diet (NO sugar or carbs of ANY kind)! I have constant headaches... I am hungry and I just plain feel like crap ! The surgery is also expensive but its a matter of: I have the surgery or I will end up dying. So... we borrowed the money and the surgery is in 2 weeks. In the meantime my Insomnia is really bad... I CANT sleep at night... and while I USED to be able to sleep during the day... I cant seem to get off to sleep anymore... plus my sleep Apnoea continues to be a problem even though I am on CPAP therapy for it.
I am SO worried that my depression or health will continue to affect the family... that I wont be able to go back to work because I am getting more sick (mentally and physically). I dont even have any friends or family that I can talk to or socialise with to get my mind off things. I am scared. And like I said before I am tired.
I dont feel like much of a man...I have a hard time facing people. Even my wife.
I know that people here cant really help me... but it helps to be able to tell somebody... I feel so alone.
I have been feeling very down for about 3 months now... its really bad. Probably worst its ever been in my life.
For those of you who have not read my other posts:
I moved from Canada to Australia about 5 years ago to marry my wife (who lived here in Aus.)
I HAD a good paying job when I first got here... but my depression and physical illness has presented problems over last 2 years.
I went back to school to get my newest qualifications so I can go back into teaching (I teach I.T.: Computer Networking, hardware and security)... but its expensive and we are living off my wifes 'average' income.
My health has been getting worse and worse over time... related to my weight mostly I think... I am a very heavy person. I hate decided to have lapband surgery to help but its tough being on the pre-surgery diet (NO sugar or carbs of ANY kind)! I have constant headaches... I am hungry and I just plain feel like crap ! The surgery is also expensive but its a matter of: I have the surgery or I will end up dying. So... we borrowed the money and the surgery is in 2 weeks. In the meantime my Insomnia is really bad... I CANT sleep at night... and while I USED to be able to sleep during the day... I cant seem to get off to sleep anymore... plus my sleep Apnoea continues to be a problem even though I am on CPAP therapy for it.
I am SO worried that my depression or health will continue to affect the family... that I wont be able to go back to work because I am getting more sick (mentally and physically). I dont even have any friends or family that I can talk to or socialise with to get my mind off things. I am scared. And like I said before I am tired.
I dont feel like much of a man...I have a hard time facing people. Even my wife.
I know that people here cant really help me... but it helps to be able to tell somebody... I feel so alone.