wi11ow
Member
Hi
i'm new here. I have dx BPD and since I stopped therapy i've stopped cutting. It had got to the point in therapy where every week just to get through the door I had to cut. I don't know why - maybe in some twisted way I did it to feel the T would care? I don't know. All I know is by leaving I didnt need to do it anymore - until now.
I recently met my birth mother for the first time and we are beginning to forge a wonderful new relationship. I've told her about the depression but not the rest but it's summer here and she has seen my arm. She's a social worker and has told me she doesnt need to know every detail as she's pretty good at listening and putting the picture together.
All I know is I don't want to start the SI again because of her. I don't want to scare her off either by opening up or by her seeing fresh scars BUT the feelings are getting too much for me to handle and I feel like I'm falling apart and I know it's just a matter of time.
I don't know what to do anymore. I'm in NZ and support isn't great here.
i'm new here. I have dx BPD and since I stopped therapy i've stopped cutting. It had got to the point in therapy where every week just to get through the door I had to cut. I don't know why - maybe in some twisted way I did it to feel the T would care? I don't know. All I know is by leaving I didnt need to do it anymore - until now.
I recently met my birth mother for the first time and we are beginning to forge a wonderful new relationship. I've told her about the depression but not the rest but it's summer here and she has seen my arm. She's a social worker and has told me she doesnt need to know every detail as she's pretty good at listening and putting the picture together.
All I know is I don't want to start the SI again because of her. I don't want to scare her off either by opening up or by her seeing fresh scars BUT the feelings are getting too much for me to handle and I feel like I'm falling apart and I know it's just a matter of time.
I don't know what to do anymore. I'm in NZ and support isn't great here.