How to approach someone with an eating disorder

[Eunoia]

How to help someone with an eating disorder
- The Alliance for Eating Disorders Awareness

How to help your friend:

DO'S

• Increase your knowledge about eating disorders (request information packets, read books, attend seminars).
• Talk with the person about your concerns in a loving and supportive way. It is important to discuss these issues with honesty and respect.
• Talk with the person at an appropriate time and place - in private, free from distractions.
• Encourage the person to seek professional help as soon as possible. Suggest that she/he see someone who specializes in eating disorders (a physician, therapist or dietician).
• Be prepared that the person may deny that she/he has a problem. If so, and if she/he refuses to get help, it will be important to tell someone else about your concerns. If your friend is under 18, her/his parents need to know immediately.
• Listen with a nonjudgmental ear.
• Talk about things other than food, weight, and exercise.
• Be available when your friend needs someone, but remember, it is okay to set limits on what you can and cannot do.
• Hang in there! It won't be easy

DONT'S

• Don't try to solve her/his problems or help with the eating disorder on your own. Get help from others.
• Don't confront your friend with a group of people, in front of a group of people.
• Don't talk about weight, food, calories, or appearance. Do not make any comments on what she/he looks like.
• Don't try to force or encourage your friend to eat. Do not get into power struggles.
• Don't let her/his peculiarities dominate you or manipulate you.
• Don't gossip about her/him to others.
• Don't be scared to talk with her/him.
• Don't expect to be the perfect friend - Reach out for support when you need it.
• Don't expect your friend to be "cured" after treatment. Recovery can be a long process.
• Don't keep this a secret for your friend. Remember, her/his life may be in danger.

How to Help Your Child:

DO'S

• Increase your knowledge about eating disorders (request information packets, read books, attend seminars).
• Talk with your child about your concerns in a loving and supportive way. It is important to discuss these issues with honesty and respect.
• Talk with your child at an appropriate time and place - in private, free from distractions.
• Seek professional help as soon as possible. Arrange to see someone who specializes in eating disorders (a physician, therapist or dietician). You can receive national and international referrals from various eating disorder organizations.
• Be prepared that your child may deny that she/he has a problem.
• Listen with a nonjudgmental ear.
• Talk about things other than food, weight, and exercise.
• Be available when your child needs someone, but remember, it is okay to set limits on what you can and cannot do.
• Hang in there!- It won't be easy.

DONT'S

• Don't try to solve her/his problems or help with the eating disorder on your own. Get help from others.
• Don't confront your child with a group of people, in front of a group of people.
• Don't talk about weight, food, calories, or appearance. Do not make any comments on what she/he looks like.
• Don't try to force or encourage your child to eat. Do not get into power struggles.
• Don't blame yourself for what is happening to your child.
• Don't let your child's peculiarities dominate you or manipulate you.
• Don't be scared to talk with your child.
• Don't expect to be the perfect parent - Reach out for support when you need it.
• Don't expect your child to be "cured" after treatment. Recovery can be a long process.
• Don't panic: Look for the help you need. It is available.

?

How to Help Your Student:

DO'S

• Increase your knowledge about eating disorders (request information packets, read books, attend seminars).
• Talk with your student at an appropriate time and place - in private, free from distractions and other students.
• Encourage your student to tell their parents.
• Encourage your student to seek professional help as soon as possible. Suggest that she/he see someone who specializes in eating disorders (a physician, therapist or dietician).
• Be prepared that the person may deny that she/he has a problem. If your student is under 18, her/his parents need to know immediately.
• Listen with a nonjudgmental ear.
• Talk about things other than food, weight, and exercise.
• Be available when your student needs someone, but remember, it is okay to set limits on what you can and cannot do.
• Hang in there! It won't be easy.

DONT'S

• Don't try to solve her/his problems or help with the eating disorder on your own. Get help from others.
• Don't confront your student in front of the class.
• Don't talk about weight, food, calories, or appearance. Do not make any comments on what she/he looks like.
• Don't try to force or encourage your student to eat. Do not get into power struggles.
• Don't gossip about her/him to others.
• Don't be scared to talk with her/him.
• Don't be scared to talk with her/him.
• Don't forget to reach out for support when you need it.
• Don't expect your student to be "cured" after treatment.? Recovery can be a long process.
• Don't keep this a secret for your student. Remember, her/his life may be in danger. If she/he is under 18, her/his parents need to know immediately.

 

[Ashley-Kate]

Re: How to approach someone w/ an ed

That is a very good post you have there .. i always like to see things like that cause it is the truth it is not fake it is reality and that is what is so scary about it ..

thanks
ashley

 

[Ashley-Kate]

Re: How to approach someone w/ an ed

just an additionnal information fr any therapist or psychiatrist treating a patient with an eating disorder, if ever the need to refer this patient, try to do your best to make her understand that she needs the transfer and that it is only to see what more that you and other can do to help her.
Aslo if ever you have to send this patient to an emergencyroom or to a doctor that isn't speicalised help her understand as well that these people are not skilled to wrok with eating disorder and that sometimes these people use terms or say things that are innapropriat such as "your not that thin" or "i have seen worst" things that may make them feel undeserving remind them that they need the help because the eating disorder tends to cloud your judgment at times and what others think is sort of extremly important cause the anorexic or bulimic feels the need to be perfect to please al the time .