It got too much, again.

[gardens]

It's great to hear from you today!
Be gentle with yourself okay! And I'm glad you have your mom around to help you.
yeah Moms! :hug:

 

[Andy]

I am glad your mother is around for you. Sometimes just having something that is breathing, around can make all the difference whether they are actively trying to help ot not. Know what I mean.
If you need to go tomorrow then do what you need to to keep safe. I must say that if your having anxiety and panic it may just be better to try to hold out until Monday (unless it is life safety issue of course) The amount of time you will be in a waiting room will be high, then you have to wait for the on call psych to get there from where ever he may be. Oh, that's me assuming your in a city. If your in a small town it's not bad. I am not trying to convince you not to go if you need to. I really want to reiterate that. I am just saying your anxiety and panic may end up worse off.
Did you know that I spent 26.5 hours in a ER once? I spent 12.5 on the side where everyone waits, and 14 on the other side of the glass sleeping on a gurney. I wrote a letter to the paper about it. They didn't publish it, but my dad wrote one similar and the health minister wrote him back. BS is what it said.

I hope you will come here if you need to as well. I'll harass you all day/night if you need to keep your mind elsewhere. :friends:

 

[Banned]

Today is a bit better of a day, but still not great. I am going to consider a trip to the hospital tomorrow if I can't shake this. It is way too much. Luckily I have my mom around on the weekend.

Are you in a position to share your struggles with your mom? The hospitals work on a triage system as I'm sure you are aware and you will likely get faster "care" from your mom. Unless you are an immediate and serious threat to yourself, you'll keep getting bumped down the priority list.

I am supose to check in with my psychiatrist on Monday anyway, but I might need assistance before that.

Monday is only a day and a half way (assuming you are in North America). I hope you can hang on until then, however, please do not hesitate to seek professional help should you feel like you can't make it.

I just can't stop crying and having bad anxiety and panic. As I said though, it is a comfort to have mom around.

Do you have medication you can take? Can you and your mom do something together tomorrow to keep you occupied and your mind in a somewhat good place?

Just will see how it goes.

Baby steps...one day at a time. That's all...one minute, one hour, one day. You can do it.

 

[NicNak]

Thanks again Gardens, STP and Persona. Yes I have anti anxiety meds, I take them once daily as needed, but been taking them daily, peroid. As well taking my antidepressants.

I guess I jumped at thinking to go to the hospital. My doctor had said when I feel I am having an "episode" to go to the hospital, but I missed the boat on that one.

Now it is just the panic and anxiety, still crying too. But not that bursting episode type things where my head feels like it is going to explode feeling like I am losing my mind.

I am supose to go to work Monday, which I don't know what to do on that, since I am still with the disability insurance and trying to go back to work gradually. I don't want any trouble with them.

I am also afraid cause I fell apart so fast. Like it has been less than a month since the rehab started and only two shifts at work. I wanted to try, I honestly didn't think I would get to full hours again, but thought I would at least be able to make it a few times a week.

I just feel so rediculous and pethetic. Sorry, not in a good mind set, but not suicidal, so no worries.

 

[Banned]

Panic and anxiety can be tough to deal with. The whole "wait it out" just doesn't cut it when the emotions are that strong and overwhelming. Then the tears come, and come, and come...and you wonder if they'll ever stop?

The good news is...they do. Sounds like you have some good support in place - meds, a doctor, mom close by. Often our nearest resources are the most instrumental in our healing. ER docs are not trained in mental health, usually. Their goal is to get you in and get you out because beds are so limited.

Again, I don't want to dissuade you for a second from getting help if you need it, but sometimes, riding it out builds strength, so that the next time it happens we know we've conquered it once before and we can hold on a little bit longer.

But...I'd still try to find something to do tomorrow so that you can redirect some of that panic and anxiety.

 

[Banned]

Hi NicNak,

I just wanted to check in and see how you made out, today. I was thinking of you and hoping that you had a good day, without too much panic or anxiety.

 

[NicNak]

Thank you persona. I am doing ok today. I will see my GP doctor tomorrow and talk to my psychiatrist.

Things will be ok. My doctors will know how to help, they always do.

Thanks Persona :hug:

 

[Banned]

I'm glad to hear that. I hope your appointment goes well tomorrow.

 

[NicNak]

I just wanting to update to say that doctor helped me out alot. She ran past my appointment time with me.

She gave me a note and a sturn but kind talking and I went on my way. I faxed the note to my Psychiatrist as well.

I speak to him later this afternoon.

Wanting to thank everyone for your support and kind words on this thread and via PM. It is so appreciated and very heart warming. Thank you everyone, you were all a great help. :kiss2:

 

[gardens]

:clap: Glad things went well!

The sturn talking too - mad me laugh :tsk:

Be well
Gardens

 

[Banned]

I'm glad your appointment with your GP went well, NicNak. I hope your other appointment went equally as well.

Sometimes a stern talking to is all that's needed to remind us of our priorities.